just a dream ; seokjin

thinking

dedicated to my friend xIzzyTheOtakux

i sat on the floor, by the mirror. we just finished practice, where the instructor told me i was slacking. it didn't matter to me. there were more important things running in my mind. about what happened.

oh, how this relationship was meant to be. it was beautiful, it really was. i wanted to marry you. be with you forever. just thinking slightly about you now brings me into tears. namjoon tries to help me, but honestly i don't think it will help me. this is something i should've dealt with myself. and the fact that i didn't.... well it just gives me shame.

i remember sitting here with you, laughing, giving you kisses, you being grossed out by the sweat. us goofing off and the members telling us to not do that in front of them. jungkook being the most grossed out. 

this heartbreak was a weight in my head holding me off from the best i could be. you know why? i'm only my best when i'm with you.

and when they say it will get better, i truly think it won't. you were my number one. however, staying with you, cuddling with you, kissing you,

it was now only just a dream.