Paint

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You can paint something bright pink. Or your favorite shade of blue. Or blinding red. Don't paint it black. Black is overdone, you probably have too much black in your life anyways. Chose the ugliest shade of paint you can find and paint a bunch of eggs that color, then smash them! Fuck, write the names of the Kardasians on them, or the name of that one asshole from kindergarten, haha!

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