Finally, it was the day of the big rumble. Layla set it for 7 o'clock in the empty field behind the old school. I would have to find a way to sneak out, since my brothers would never let me go.
I had to be there, giving people what they deserve is the best feeling in the world. I decided I would have to dress like a guy to get away with beating up Jim and Kevin. That would be easy because guy clothes is really all I have.Something about the thrill of it gets me fired up. That kind of makes me sound like a serial killer. I would never forgive myself if I actually hurt someone real bad. It's different when the person you're beating up starts it, though.
Me and my brothers were eating dinner, Alex made me cook. He says I need to learn " house stuff " if I want to be a mom. I don't want to have kids, I can't stand them. I don't know if I want to get married or not, either. I don't know if I even want to grow up.
He also says I need to learn fine motor skills. I don't have a very big vocabulary on account of me not being really smart. I do know what fine motor skills are, though. I've heard that tearm too many times. My brain dosen't work very well, so I can't really write or use scissors or even do my eyeshadow without messing up. He says I'm getting better, though. When I was a little kid, around 5 or 6, I remember my parents trying to teach me to read and write and be like the other kids like their life depended on it. I still don't have very good handwriting.
" Addie, I ain't tryin' to be mean but these carrots don't taste very good " Alex pointed out. Allen gave him a look that said Alexander Larson you better say sorry right this second or I'll kill you.
" Sorry, kiddo. You know I was just messin' with you " he laughed.
" It's my fault anyway. I can't cook for shit " I replied.
Allen let us swear, just not at each other or in front of adults. He was never as strict as our parents.
I got out of my chair and hurried to my room. I don't know why I was getting so upset over something like this, usually I don't cry when people make fun of me.
I closed the door and just about cried a river. Thinking about all that had happened in the last few months -- I couldn't handle it anymore, but then again I never really handled it in the first place.
How was I supposed to live on my own if I could barely make dinner without burning myself or ruining it ?
There was a knock at the door. It was Alex.
" I'm sorry Addie " he sighed.
" I ain't cryin' about that " I explained.
" Then what are you cryin' about ? "
" None of your buissness. Go away "
" Addie is this about what Jim did ? If it is you know I'm gonna beat his ass tonight " he said, trying to cheer me up.
" Alex, I'm sorry. I'm sorry I can't write good or cook dinner or stay out of trouble or take care of myself. I'm sorry for all the trouble I've caused in the last few months. Hell, Allen shouldn't have taken me to that damn hospital. He should've let me die. At least then he wouldn't have to work so much " I sobbed. I don't know why I just told him everything out of nowhere. I never think right.
" Addie...... " Allen said, leaning against the door frame.
" Just go to your fight. Beat up those Flames " I interrupted.
" We ain't goin' till you quit cryin', kid " he replied.
" Y'all know how I am. I cry all the time and there's nothin' you can do to stop it so just go to your damn fight and beat those sons of bitches " I snapped.
" If you really wanna go that bad, I guess you can " Allen sighed. I stared at him in disbelief, exept I couldn't see very well because the tears made everything blurry.
" Really ? " I asked, not entirely sure if this was a joke or not.
" Just stay close and let us take care of the big ones and don't you dare go near Jim or Kevin, alright ? "
" Alright "
I still couldn't belive they were letting me go. If this was any other gang fight they would both give me long, boring lectures about how I wouldn't be able to defend myself and how it was for my own good. They were right, on the second part though. The only reason they were so protective was because they cared about me, even before what happened in the park. I didn't think I was lucky at the time, but now I know I am. Allen gave up a whole lot just so he could keep us together.
