“Well, well, well, look what we have here.” One of them sneered – the guy who had said I had a gun in my pants.
I rolled my eyes. “Dudes, I think we should forget each other’s faces and move on.” I smiled harshly. “It’s best that we don’t know each other’s names.”
“And why is that?” Another sneered.
“I don’t want to go with the cliché,” I sighed. “But I told you, I would have to kill you – which I am extremely capable of doing, just so you might know.”
I was bluffing, of course, all the way through. I hoped they didn’t notice.
“Are you…are you that criminal that’s been running around?” Another of the men stammered. I let an evil grin creep onto my face and nodded slowly.
“Now, we can call this a truce, and I’ll forget the incident with the girl earlier,” I started, smirking inwardly at their shocked faces. “Or, of course, we can engage in a little…hand to hand combat.”
“No, no!” The men backed up a few steps in fear. “In fact, we’d love if you joined our…gang.”
“I don’t do gangs. I ride solo.” I replied calmly, before walking past them. “Enjoy your night.”
After five minutes, I happened upon a nightclub, with a neon sign saying ‘THE EFF WORD’ flickering above the doorway. I snuck around the back as an employee put out some rubbish, and quickly snuck inside before the door slammed. I was in, without having to wait in a huge line.
Music blasted, people laughed, and the bartenders served drinks to those waiting at the bar. I weaved through the people, watching the lights flash and shadows dance as I made it to the dance floor. A group of girls were on their own, dancing amongst themselves and pumping the air with their fists. I walked over and greeted them.
“Hi.” I grinned, shoving my hands into my jeans – male ones, this time.
“Hey!” They chorused. One of them – a pretty blue-eyed, black-haired girl nudged me with her hip and grinned.
“My name’s Lola.” She smiled. “Dance with me?”
And I would have, if I hadn’t stepped forward and fallen over; flat on my face. “Ouch!” I howled, clutching my nose. “I think I broke it.”
“Shoot!” Lola helped me up with concern masking her features. “Do you need to go to the hospital?”
I nodded mutely. She repeated my movement, grabbing my hand and dragging me out of the club. “Do you want to take your car or mine?” She asked as we approached the car park.
“Yours,” I replied immediately. She nodded and dragged me to her small Golf. We got in and she accelerated, but not before I realised something.
I had lost my handbag.
Well, shoot. There go my fake boobs.
