window thoughts | kk ; kt

9pm

9;00pm

dear kenma,

it's lonely without you by my side. i got suspended from school today for kicking some guy. he said you deserved what you got, and everything that's happened to you.
god, can you believe it? after months of ignoring your harsh yet undeniable words, i can't help but agree to it.
"this world's messed up." you whispered as you clutched my hand tightly as we lashed in bed past midnight — sinking into each other's touch. and now i reply to those words,

"it really is, only because you're not here."

hey kenma, i miss you a lot. and i know— i know i say that all the time, but you never seem to get annoyed by it. probably because you never hear me say it anyway. and because you're not even here to say your part to my spoken words.
did you know? there's not a day where i never think of you. you're my little pudding cake. i miss your yellow hair, that little smile you make when i saying something stupid, how you punch me in the face because i interrupted your gaming time,
i miss all of it.

but other than the actions you've done that's left a heartfelt impact on me,
i miss you the most kenma.

people always told me how it's surprising to them that i'm gay, but people have started to accept me, only after you left though. it seemed like if you never left my side, people would still give us looks or call us faggots.

but when you left it's like people just wanted to care for me. comes to show how no one cared about you. 'oh i'm so sorry for you loss, wanna date?'
jesus, how humiliating. now i can proudly say, i'm currently dating the most purest, loving, and irreplaceable human you would've ever met.
that's a good idea! i'll go shout out to the world that i dated, no, am dating, the best person that ever stepped foot in this world. everyone else could go suck it. it was me that claimed kenma kozume.
and still am claiming.

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haha. sorry about those tears on the paper, i was thinking about the first time you said, "i love you."

but now you've added one more word to that sentence,

"goodbye, i love you."