Short Stories

Story | Jacks Mechanical Booty

Hey guys! Welcome to my new book! This book is basically what is in the description, it's going to be a book about short stories and my ships. And I'm not talking about boats. A ship is when you join two names together, who you think should be together and date. Don't really have any, but I'll update when I have a new one :) Anywho, let's begin!
This idea was inspired by TinyFireCrystal101 
~Ellie

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JACKSEPTICEYE'S MECHANICAL BOOTY

One day Jacksepticeye, was walking down the street when his friend Matt walked by him and said

'Jack why the warm face?'

Jack replied 'Because my boyfriend, Markiplier left me.'

Matt was heartbroken, he knew Jack loved his boyfriend deeply. He reassuringly patted him on the back.

'There, there green head' he said, Jacks favorite nickname Matt always called him when he was feeling down.

Jack said 'What should I do?'

Matt replied 'Maybe find out what he likes best?'

Jack shrugged, how on earth could Jack find that out. Had any man ever found that out? So Jack left Matt and decided to go to McDonalds to ponder.

He ordered a gargantuan llama, for that was his comfort food. Surprisingly it wasn't too much food for him because Jack is a stress eater. He also has a hollow leg where he stores his left-overs. He looked at his leg, then something occurred to him.

He realized that his boyfriend had only ever seen him on camera. Once he saw him in real life, for some reason he broke up with him immediately. As he feasted on the Llama he had an epiphany.

Maybe his boyfriend broke up with him because of his saucy booty, for he had never seen it before then. When you watch YouTubers, you usually only see them from the waist up, and that may have startled his boyfriend into leaving him.

He shouted 'FUZZY ILLUMINATI!' and ran to go see his best friend Matt.

He told Matt that his boyfriend broke up with him because of his saucy booty, and asked what he could do about it. He knew this was important to his boyfriend because every time they talked, he always mentioned various other YouTuber's booties, and how he admired either the roundness of them, or the size, or the fact that they were usually clean.

Matt told him that he should only look for someone that could appreciate his booty. But Jack wanted him back, and would give up anything for it, even his Crusty Tater-Tots. See, in Ireland, Crusty Tater-Tots are used as currency because of their abundance of potatoes.

Matt pooped in anger. He licked Jack's face, because he needed electrolytes, and Jack was sweating cause he just witnessed Matt poop.

After Matt calmed down, he said, 'I guess if you really want him back, you're going to have to get a new booty.'

A new booty? Was that possible? Hope began to burst within him. Finally, a ray of light.

Jack said 'How?'

Matt thought long and hard, he thought about plastic surgery implants, but Jack was Irish, so his body would reject it immediately and then Jack too would have the anger poops. See, Matt didnt orginally want Jack to get the surgery because Matt did it to get his own wife back from leaving him, and it left him with anger poops.

'Get a Mechanical Booty' said Matt, his voice full of regret.

Jack slapped Matt, then slapped his own booty, because that would be the last time he ever felt it, cause he was going to get a Mechanical Booty.

The surgery went well because of course he had Shane Dawson perform it. He healed up and went to go see his boyfriend.

He knocked on the door, Mark answered it.

'What are you doing here Jack?' he exclaimed.

Jack said nothing, turning around to reveal his hard, shiny silver booty. He gasped for air and started crying.

'Jack! Jack!' he cried.

'I did this for you!' he yelled.

Then he turned around, and revealed his own Mechanical Booty. He stepped back in shock.

'I didnt leave you for your booty, I left you because I didn't want you to see my booty, what with the anger poops and all'

'That would never keep me from you.! he said. He embracer Markiplier.

Matt smiled in the background, cause Matt knew all along. Love will find a way.