Silence is Key (Sabriel)

Sammy don't do this

Sam and Gabriel have been dating for about ten months. The school year has ended and they are excited for summer. Sam walked over to Gabriel's because he slept in one summer day and Dean was gone and Bobby was working. Once when Sam got to the door Gabriel was oddly waiting for him.

"Heya Samsquatch, was wondering when you were gonna show up. Deano is in the house making out with Cassie." Gabriel said with a smirk.

"Sorry would've came when Dean did I just don't feel like myself lately." Sam came clean about something Gabriel never knew.

"What's wrong Sammy, you can tell me you know." Gabriel said while giving Sam a hug and walking into the house.

"Well, I've been like this since the beginning of May. I don't know what's wrong I just don't feel like myself like I mean I'm sad or depressed then the next minute I'm angry. But there is one thing I'm barely happy, unless I'm with you and that rarely happens now." Sam said as they sat on the couch.

"Well did you want to come over more or me come over more because I was wondering why we don't see each other as much anymore and was just thinking." Gabriel suggested as they were on the couch talking.

"Yea, er could I spend the night here tonight?" Sam asked while looking at Gabriel with a sad look.

"Of course you can Samwich, you are always welcomed to come and spend the night." Gabriel said as he scooched over to Sam and kissed him.

"Awe just too adorable." Cas poked fun.

"Oh yea definitely just too adorable." Dean teased along.

"Shut up Deano and Cassie considering you two do it all the time." Gabriel smirked.

"We're not." Dean protested but there was a faint smile.

"I don't care I'll admit it." Cas said and turned Dean to face him and gave him a sloppy kiss.

"Awe that wasn't adorable." Sam said as he and Gabriel walked into the kitchen.

"Shut up!" Dean yelled.

Sam spent the night at Gabriel's. They were in Gabriel's room talking about why and when Sam began to feel how he feels now. They were thinking that maybe it was well they actually didn't know why or what it would be. They looked up symptoms of Depression and Bipolar disorder well let's say it fit but they couldn't be sure if it was that unless he went to a doctors. They knew he had Anxiety so maybe it was just that acting up but it never happened before.

Weeks gone by he was better then worse. No matter what he did nothing helped Gabriel helped a little otherwise Sam was asleep.

Sam took a shower and he was toying with the idea of cutting he knew it was stupid and selfish but he needed something that would help if he didn't have Gabriel. So he took one of Dean's razors and cut a little line on his left arm, when he did he instantly hated it but loved it also. He began to cut luckily he had long sleeve shirts.

After about a month of cutting, he went to spend the night at Gabriel's he left his razors at home because of Gabriel. Gabriel noticed that he has been wearing long sleeves for a while now so he confronts him about it.

"Hey Samsquatch what's up with all the long sleeves?" Gabriel asked while he was sitting on the bed with him.

"Uh no reason just prefer long sleeves." Sam said hoping the subject was dropped.

"Really, so you wouldn't care if I did this?" Gabriel said as he jumped on top of Sam and forced his sleeves up.

Gabriel looked at the scars some new some not. Sam had tears brimming his eyes, Gabriel looked at him then the scars.

"Why?" Gabriel asked.

"Well-" Sam started but was cut off with Gabriel kissing his lips once then one scar then lips then a scar he did that for twenty scars ten on each arm.

"I don't care why, but I do want you and need you to stop other wise..." Gabriel let his sentence hang.

"Other wise what?" Sam asked oddly smiling.

"I'm sure deep down inside you know." Gabriel said but Sam gave him a hurt look. "No, I'm not going to break up with you." Gabriel added by the look of Sam and Sam just kind of perked up a little.

Gabriel let his guard down and flipped them so he was on top. Gabriel smiled and he adjusted so that he was comfortable and he was falling asleep. Sam just looked at how adorable he was. Sam laid down and Gabriel scooted closer and they cuddled. Gabriel was asleep or so Sam thought, he began to apologize about the cutting and something else once again Gabriel was oblivious to.

"I know I'm not the best but I love you and I'm sorry." Sam said while he looked at Gabriel. Gabriel opened his eyes and startled Sam a little.

"What are you sorry about?" Gabriel asked.

"I know that you don't know but I can't I won't tell you." Sam said while he was crying.

"Why are you crying, babe don't do this, Sammy I swear to god if I know what you're talking about I swear." Gabriel stopped he began to cry at the thought.

"No please just no you can't but you deserve better." Sam said while still crying.

"No Sam what I deserve is for you to actually accept yourself and come back to me that's what I deserve." Gabriel kind of snapped, Sam just looked at him he was about to say something but Gabriel quickly added, "If I thought I didn't deserve you I would've said something Sam but I need and deserve you and I know you need and deserve me so NEVER think that way ever again alright Sammy don't do this, don't do it because if you do you'll destroy me you'll destroy the best of me so NEVER think that way again and if I hear that talk again I don't know what I'll do with myself."

Sam sighed in defeat and said, "Okay Gabriel I won't." Sam tried to resist the tears but they were just coming.

Sam never did anything without Gabriel knowing. Gabriel insisted he knew about everything and Sam obliged.

For about two or three months he stopped cutting completely and he was feeling better in every way he felt down. Also not once did he thought or brought up about killing himself ever again.