Love is Just a Force of Nature

Chapter 15: The Weak Girl I Was

I woke up with bags under my eyes and a heavy heart. What I saw yesterday was a real slap round the face and a punch to the stomach. I felt sick, so much so that I couldn't bare the thought of school. It had to be done.

The unfortunate thing was that I didn't even know if Tyler was going to be there. The boy who has broke my heart so many times in the past couple of days. He could be there roaming the halls waiting to do it again, waiting to ruin my life and all the trust I have for him.

Everyone just seems so distant. I'm in a chamber trapped and isolated from everyone else. They all want to hurt me. This has to be the only explanation, why else would everyone set out to screw me over.

I let Jake in yesterday, into my heart and mind. I gave him my trust when he could so easily break it. I have to be careful and on guard, nobody else can hurt me like Morgan and Tyler did. I just can't take it anymore.

With that being said I forced myself out of bed to my awaited torture. My mind was to crowded to think about what I'm wearing. Sweat pants and a t-shirt would do. My hair was just in a ponytail and I would go with no make-up on. Why hide the fact that I'm broken? They already know it. I already know it. If I let them win now they might leave me alone.

I made my way down the stairs looked around instinctively to find nobody there. Every now and they I forget I live alone. Usually I have a friend here, maybe Kayla or Tyler. My life just isn't the way it used to be.

I walked to the door and put on a hoodie. I looked like a grouch today. I haven't even showered, that's how bad I look. I just don't know why I should bother anymore.

I didn't want to drive to school, my trusting bond with cars is also ruined. I don't feel safe. I wanted to walk, that way I could be aware of everything at once.

Today wasn't like any other day. The walk to school didn't clear my mind. They only made it denser. Thoughts raced through my head and attacked everybody I knew. They told me why I shouldn't trust them and why I should stay away. The thoughts scared me. They gave me reason to believe that being alone in this world was safer then being in a group, or being surrounded by love ones.

The only loved one I have is Kayla and eventually she'll leave as well. I have that effect apparently. Maybe she'll become friends with Tyler, Carlie, Morgan or even Jake. The group of people who want me ruined.

I could see the school building in the distance. It was about to happen, I could feel something so terrible about to ruin everything else that I had.

I was right. Jake and Kayla were talking but they seemed to be getting along. I wasn't threatened. Maybe I was right about Jake after all? Maybe just maybe he would be my saviour. The light at the end of the tunnel.

I find myself being hopeful when so quickly it was ruined. Tyler was approaching Jake with Carlie. She turned round to see me with the biggest smirk I had ever seen. She was winning. Everything that she had worked for she finally has. Tyler, the boy of our dreams. We shared one interest and that was him.

My thoughts were interrupted when I saw a crowd gathering. They were circling Tyler and Jake, I could hear shouting and immediately I knew it wasn't good.

I ran to the crowd and pushed my way into the middle. I met eyes with Kayla, she looked me up and down and her eyes said one thing, disappointment.

"Why are you letting her do this?" She mouthed to me as she held out her hands and shook her head.

I shrugged and whispered "I don't know what to do"

She ran her fingers through her hair and let out a sigh "Right now what you need to do is stop this, whether it's for Tyler or Jake. One of them will get hurt and it's your doing. I know you don't like the sound of that but they need you. Even though it may seem like Tyler doesn't"