Recovery

Get off me

Jade.

Its getting dark. Me and Darren had fun and did well forgetting and ignoring our problems. It was nice for it to be us for a while, like we were friends. I'm nervous to admit it but I contemplated kissing him at one point. I just miss him I guess. He decided to spend the night at his place and meet me tomorrow morning at the hospital before school. Once he is gone I go to my living room to turn everything off until I see Darren's phone on my coffee table.

I slip on a cardigan and shoes and grab his phone, mine and my keys on the way out. I drive to his place and I would have been tired but he got texts every five seconds, literally. I sigh and I pull over outside of his apartment building.

I tap on my steering wheel. I try to resist the urge to look but with the flashing light and constant pinging of his phone it's unbearable. I see his home screen lint up and I start reading from the bottom up.

Sam❤️: hey, we need to talk.

Sam❤️: I know you're ignoring me even though I didn't do anything wrong but I guess it's good that you won't see these for a while.

Sam❤️: but you have to listen now.

Sam❤️: it's important, very important.

Sam❤️: I know this will be hard for you to hear, well, read.

Sam❤️: but I can't hold it in, and you need to know.

Sam❤️: I'm pregnant.

Sam❤️: we both know it's yours, you know you were my first.

Sam❤️: I'm sorry.

I put the phone down and I instantly run my hand through my hair and I clench. I tug so hard I feel my hair about to fall out, I can't scream. I release my hair and I see my scalp is bleeding. A drop of blood falls down the centre of my forehead and I wipe it away. The stinging takes my focus away and I calm down enough to move.

I take a deep breath and I feel myself get angry, but the kind of angry that fuels the badass, or bullies. The resentful anger that lingers.

I take an anger fuelled breath and I step out of the car and walk to the stairs. As I walk up the stairs angry tears fall, I wipe them away and I head straight for his door.

I give three powerful knocks and after about ten seconds Darren opens the door and rubs his eye. I hand his phone to him and he reads the messages, I watch as the blood leaves his face. Anger rushes through me and as a tear falls my fist rises and I punch him with all my force, I hear and feel a satisfying crunch as his nose is struck.

I see the neighbour open his door as Darren screams. I walk down the stairs as all the other residents open their curtains or doors. I leave the block without any hassle, steaming tears running down my face and blood dripping down my head and neck probably helped with that.

I walk to my car and I breathe deeply. I keep my thoughts silent and I clean my face and neck. I drive home and I go straight to my bathroom. I check my hair and scalp and I clean it properly. I'll get it checked out tomorrow morning.

I take off my cardigan and I set my alarm. I lay down and instantly the messages flood my mind. I burst into tears and I feel an intense urge to play music. I'm not allowed a piano so I grab my phone and I check for a local music shop to buy a guitar or something.

I put my phone away and I go to the bottom drawer of my night stand and grab sleeping pills. I take them and I let the darkness fill my vision.