SIX YEARS LATER || HS ✔️

three

The moments of being in the editing business can be completely terrible to exhausting very so quickly. I love the job, but due to all of the stress from the people I work with, nothing makes the job at its best. My time spent in this office is from mainly from the early morning to late at night, unless there is a specialty of a party Nicky inviting me.

And this is one of those times of when I dread taking the editing job, wishing I could be currently snoozing in my bed and being one of those one winner authors. Now, that would be a sight to see, but I am in desperate need of the money, quick money. Mom has been falling quite ill the last few weeks while my father has been working his ass of to support the household, and it surprises me that he is. I do recall him retiring from his job years back, but thankfully, he was hired another job later in the years.

My mind cannot help but decipher the conversation with Harry from weeks ago. Of course, I frequently get lost in the midst of my thoughts, but every single damn day, he has been on my mind. Well, not his presence, but small excerpts from our past chats, as well as his deep voice. Fortunately, I have not been met with his silhouette ever since the club night, and that makes life a little easier honestly.

Although my brain is taken away with his voice, my eyes still are seeing reality playing in front of me, and that is all I am needing. And that's the thing I hate the most, well somewhat. The cliche way of it all playing is Harry saw me about two months ago, my first love. Six years ago was the end of it, me telling Harry to leave as I caught him with another woman. But, six years later, it's the start of something different, once again, and it has to be with the first man I ever loved.

Bryan will always be there, I know deep in my heart he will. Yet, Harry was seemingly never there, but either with another woman or doing what he loves, which wasn't me. But, I could be completely incorrect on my opinions, as I was years and years ago from me telling and whispering to myself, "he's not cheating on you."

But God, oh God, he was.

Perhaps I am overthinking this, the overwhelming and terrible disaster that just popped into my life two months ago. Maybe, just maybe, Harry's gone, and karma was trying to make me feel the aching pain in my chest as I did six years ago when I was with that damn shrink. But, if it was, there is no pain, and there's no regret. Slightly a feeling of care and fate, but none of the negative emotions.

Thinking back to the relationship, I realize that there was truthfully no advantage for Harry. From what I have seen, there is always one person who is relieved to be out of the relationship, while the other victim is crying or depressed about the entire thing. And the reaction to me is that maybe Harry wasn't the one who was relieved, unless he made a front and faked the situation, which I do indeed doubt. There was no way that I was happy about leaving the relationship. Hell, I could barely make it without that damned shrink, and I am slightly thankful for the talking.

"I need a break," I murmur to myself, hoping no one would barge into my small office to notice me speaking anyone in particular. That would be one hell of a sight to see, and possibly being the center of attention for a couple weeks, since all of the people I work with are always looking for the next topic of gossip.

Quickly motoring my body around the wooden desk, an eruption of memories are brought back to my brain as my fingers scan across the object. And of course, it has to be the only thing I've been trying to get my mind off for the few months; Harry. The wooden desk, messing with the stray ends of my slightly greased hair, and the few (or sometimes many) cuss words that would fly straight out of my chapped lips. Those are days that aren't supposed to be looked at due to the horrible weakness I had showed, especially opening up about my past life.

I haven't seen Mrs. Forman ever since her dismissing me a small 'good luck' and forgiving goodbye. That's the relieving side of it; me not having to deal with reminiscing with the past memories if I caught one single glimpse of her elder face. Perhaps a few days ago, I believed I was over the events, which are supposed to be put behind me, but with all the signs surrounding me, there is absolutely no way I am fully, completely over the situation. Some things are meant to take more time than others, obviously.