Fleeting Sanity, Approaching Agony.

If it pleases the masses...

   Never really considered myself a modern day Casanova, but I usually treated the gals I dated really well. What has that always gotten me? Multiple partners who have cheated because I refuse to jump into sex right off the bat. I've always been courteous, and really gentlemanly (in my own opinion).
   This last girl was different, se wasn't in a rush for sex, or really any aspect of a relationship. She was the prime example of a virgin. I was her first everything. First boyfriend, first kiss, first taste of true love, and first taste of utter heart break.
   We just ended the relationship today, and she didn't take it well. Too be expected with a first heart break. I took it surprisingly well, seeing as I no longer held the same feeling for her. I had already told her everything I've been thinking about when it comes to us. And she then sent me a long message with every bit of information I had already told her flipped to make it sound like her own thoughts and ideals.
   I had effectively broken up with her about a week before today but she was not too keen on the idea. She wanted to talk, try to patch things up. It was no use. You can't fix what you don't want fixed. I didn't love her anymore, and she couldn't understand that.
    Too be honest, I had felt like I was stringing her along for a while now. I felt terrible for doing that so I had to end that for both our sakes. I didn't want to lie anymore, I didn't want her to get even more destroyed then she already was going to be. I couldn't put a nice girl like her through that. So I felt it better to end it rather then continue to lie. It was an awful experience, breaking her heart. I watched her usual bright expression turn a disastrous dark and tears form in her usual cheerful eyes. Her voice went from a soothing calm to a storm of despair and forlorn. I felt like a monster at the time, but I knew I was saving her and me from greater despair.  After thinking about it all of today, I realized I did the right thing.
   If you happen to disagree and believe I'm a terrible person? That's your right as a person, and I won't judge you. If you agree once again, you're entitled to think that way. I will never judge someone based on an opinion, even if it goes against my own. That said if you do disagree, I don't care what you have to say, nothing you could say to me would make me feel any different. I feel the way I feel and that's all there is to it. I can't change the way I feel about this whole situation, so deal with it. Or don't, I don't really care.
   Once again, just the inner thoughts of a caveman.