A Little Something

Hate You?

I know you don't really deserve an explanation and I don't know why I am giving you one,

But you should know that I don't hate you.

I can't.

I wasn't born to hate and push people away,

I am not the one in charge of judging you.

Just know that just like you walked out of my life, like you didn't care
I am now removing myself from your life and, walking out, like I don't care.

Because I want to see if it hurts you,

I want you to feel what I felt,

I want you to know how many questions I asked myself,

Like was it that you didn't care,

Was it that you hated me,

What was it that made you leave!

What!?

I need you to see how it feels,

So maybe you can open your eyes and finally realize how much damage you did to me.

Because after you left,

I was forced to be strong and swallow all the tears.

And I tried so hard to get your attention,

But I just couldn't, you left me out of everything.

So right now don't ask yourself if I hate you,

Because I don't,

I just don't feel like dealing with you anymore,

I just can't.

I need to let you go,

And start my life where you are not part of it.

You wanted to leave and you did,

So it's sort of my turn to leave you and let you go.

I don't hate you, because I can't and I don't want to,

Your my dad,

And I'm not going to give you the same thing you gave me.

But right now,

I prefer for you to leave me alone.

It's better,

Because I just don't understand yet how you could never just answer my question of why you left.

But don't worry I don't hate you,

I can't,

My heart loves you so much that I just can't,

It has forgiven you and I have too.

My sister is probably right,

I am hurt,

I have always been,

Because I could never let it go.

No one ever showed me how to get rid of the pain I had when you left,

And I just pushed it deep down like I always did.

But I don't hate you dad,
I love you so much, that it hurt me when you left
And you could never show how much you loved me back,

And that's why I gave up,

And I told you I didn't want anything to do with you,

Because you never listened.

I would always want to say something,

But you never listened to it,

You would tell me that it could wait.

And sometimes all I wanted was a hug,

But you were to busy to notice,

You were to busy to notice a lot of things.

But I always put them aside and told myself that you just didn't have time right now,

Even though you did,

But you never seemed to notice me.

But to hate you?
No.
I don't hate you.
I will never hate you dad,
And I hope you know why I just don't want to talk to you right now,

But if you can't understand that, I get it,
Just know that I don't hate you,

I love you to much to be able to.......

A/N: I wrote this at 3am so sorry if it is a little to long or if it doesn't make sense........