That Swing Set

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Once there used to be a swing set outside our house in the suburbs. The swing set had two swings and I used to love swinging in the spring afternoon with my favorite raspberry ice cream. The swing on the right side used to make a creaking sound every time I used to swing back. As a seven year old I was always fascinated by the sound and wondered what was causing that sound. But we don't have that swing set outside our house anymore. Maybe it was because I am forty two now and I won't fit into it anymore. Or maybe because my twin sisters died when I was fourteen.

A year after their death my parents removed the swing set from our backyard. My twin sisters Rosa and Roma were precious little bundles of joy when my parents brought them home for the first time. My parents used to love them to death. On Christmas, they used to get loads of presents and they used to be so happy. The bright smiles that used to spread across their faces were priceless. I used to share my presents with them because I am their big brother.

When they were toddlers my mother had given them all of my toys and some more. She said I didn't need them anymore. I was upset with that for a while but their innocent happiness when they got the toys filled me up with so much emotion. The swing set was my life, my relief. Whenever I used to swing forward, a gush of cool evening breeze used to brush my face with soothing caress. On my twelfth birthday, my mother had baked a chocolate caramel cake. I hate chocolate caramel cake. But she smiled and told me that my sisters loved it and would be very happy when they see it. Her mentioning Rosa and Roma made me not argue anymore.

Since then it was all about Rosa and Roma's happiness. They were only four years old but they were being spoilt carelessly by my parents. I hated every minute of it. My parents didn't love me anymore. They didn't kiss me goodnight anymore, just Rosa and Roma. Why? Because they were my little sisters and I was too grown up apparently.

I used to pray every time that some random UFO crosses over our house and vaporises them with their death ray gun. I was lonely and unloved. I blamed Rosa and Roma for every bit of it.

One day, when i was fourteen, my parents said that they have a surprise for the twins. All of us ran towards the backyard and there it was. My favourite swing set was there in the backyard with the names 'ROSA' and 'ROMA' engraved on the seats of each swing. That is how my swing set was no longer mine. It was theirs.

Rosa never used to share her swing with me. Spoiled and selfish, she enjoyed my pain, smiling like the devil child she was. Roma used to say that I was too big and old for her swing and would break it down with my weight. Like I did not know exactly why she wouldn't let me swing. She was only trying to manipulate me with her sweet bitter words of concern for her swing. I could see it in her eyes that she, too, enjoyed my pain. It was becoming very difficult for me to live. It was suffocating me slowly. I wanted to leave home but where could i have gone instead?

Hence, I thought of a better plan. The plan after which all my problems would be solved and dead. After my plan worked, I was scared. Scared of getting caught. My parents thought I was shocked by the traumatic event of my sisters' death. But the truth is, I was more afraid of the cops who came to meet us.

After a few months, everything went back to normal. It was almost like they were never born in the first place. Sure, I would find my mother crying in the kitchen with their photos in her lap. But i was sure she'd get over it. My parents removed the swing set after a year from our backyard. I wasn't upset about it. It had too many bad memories associated with it. The ones I do not want to think about ever. Moreover, they had their names on the swings. The swing set was no longer mine.

Things were normal around the house. My parents still did not kiss me good night or make me strawberry cheesecake for my birthday. But it was okay, at least I had my peace back. Peace of mind is very important and I have done a lot of things to gain it.

Mostly, I just remember the swing set and think about the happy first eight years of my life before them. Those eight years and my favourite swing set cross my mind everyday. It's just wonderful. It's beautiful. It's peaceful. As I said, peace of mind is very important and one who doesn't have it are doomed to live a fruitless life of sadness and loneliness. To be happy is to be peaceful.

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⏰ Last updated: Oct 22, 2016 ⏰

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