Queen Kemp

A Future King Is Born

2 happy years later a new arrival entered Buckingham Palace one sunny morning from the nearby hospital. Prince Baby Luke had arrived on the scene 2 days ago and was now being taken home by his parents.

All the maids and servants were cooing and gaping at the tiny newborn as Drew and Shane entered.

"He's beautiful"

"What an adorable baby"

"Tooo cuuute"

"Luke suits him perfectly"

"Why has he got a beard?"

That last remark was a very good question indeed. For this tiny baby Luke did infact have a beard which at first startled Drew and Shane when he popped out but of course being his parents they still loved him just the same. The 2nd midwife which had to replace the 1st when Luke came out with a man's face didn't know what was wrong. But there were no health issues so he would probably be fine.

"Let me hold my grandson!" cried Kier bursting through the crowd of staff to get to them.

Shane took the little bundle out of its golden pram and placed it in Kier's arms whilst it was still tightly wrapped in extortionate satin.

"Oh. Isn't he the cutest thing?" Kier looked at Shane.

The baby sqwauked in response.

"I'm so proud of you my boy" Kier ruffled Shane's hair, messing up all the expensive hair products that was in it.

Laurence then appeared.

"He's got a beard" was the first thing he said.

"I know" said Kier.

"How?"

"Must be Drew's fault. Our family have never birthed bearded babies"

*****

Prince Luke very soon became the next best thing. He was a glamour baby and hundreds of news companies came in wanting to take pictures of "Babies Daily Life" and "The secret life of royal babies".

Nobody could get enough of him. He was the most famous baby around and he knew it. That baby obviously had traits from Granny Kier and soaked up his riches and would flaunt his rich baby stuff by posing adorably whenever a film crew were in. The nation loved him! Over time the wriggly baby became a snobby little prat who would order the staff around worse than Kier ever did.

"Who's my favourite grandson?" Kier patted Luke on the head.

Shane rolled his eyes.

"Now do you want Granny to get you some cookies?" Kier picked the cuddly thing up and placed him on his lap.

Luke scratched his beard as if thinking deeply but the answer was obviously yes.

"Yes!" he sqwauked.

"Very well" Kier's warm look turned to ice as he faced a sleepy looking butler no52 and screamed "Get some choc chip cookies through here immediately!"

The butler jumped out his skin and instantly bowed and left saying rather grudgingly "Of course Your Majesty"

Shane looked up from his paper. "You're going to teach him bad manners"

"Excuse me? Who's the one sitting reading a fucking newspaper, neglecting their son and leaving their disheveled Grandmother to look after him instead?"

"Language!" Shane said frowning.

"Fucking" Luke gurgled.

"Oh look. That was his first word remember?" Kier happily said.

"Fucking..... Fucking fucking fucking" Luke repeated.

"God save us" muttered Shane.

"God save me you mean" Kier corrected.

"Whatever"

*****

"Giddy up horsey" Luke was riding a rather traumatized looking Hendrix around the room. He held the poor dog by the ears and wouldn't let go.

"Stop it now young Prince" servant no20 said.

"No" Luke said.

"Aaawwwoooooo!!!" wailed Hendrix.

"I think you should Prince Luke"

"No. I'm in charge of YOU. You're not incharge of ME. So goodbye"

"But Prin-"

Kier walked into the room.

"What seems to be the problem?"

"I want to ride Hendrix but he's trying to stop me" Prince Luke grumpily pointed at a trembling servant no20.

"You're fired" Kier said to the servant.

"I'm what?"

"I never liked you anyway. Goodbye"

The servant stood their in utter disbelief before storming out.

"Now darling" Kier turned back to Luke. Even though Kier still hated Drew he had at least produced a very sweet, adorable child according to Kier, which was about the only good thing Drew had done and could ever do.
"If you want to ride then there are 203 horses waiting for you down at the stable" Kier pinched Luke's cheek.

"I don't like them"

"Then I'll get you a new one"

*****

It was Christmas time and the Royal family (well the servants) were busy bustling about to get everything looking nice for the annual family photo. Luke loved his grandmother's hair so decided to get it cut and dyed just like the Queens even though he was only 5.

"Everybody ready?" said the camera man.

"Ready!" the 5 voices cried, followed by a soft bark from Hendrix on the floor.

Prince Laurence and Queen Kier stood at the back on little stepladders arm in arm. In front were Shane and Drew lovingly holding each other with Shane covering a few smears of Drew's lipstick on him which he tried to get off after the mistletoe. Hendrix sat faithfully by Shane's side with one paw squishing his foot and Luke sat snuggled in his mother's arms almost fast asleep and for once actually being a joy to have around.

"Smile!"

Everybody smiled including Hendrix as the photographer looked through his lense.

FLASH!

The camera took the picture which would then appear the next day in the paper. It turned out really well, partly because they hired the best photographer in the world and also because they all looked normal... Minus Luke's beard.

I suppose that was the thing. They seemed normal. How a Royal family should be. To everyone else in the outside world they seemed the most boring people ever but of course as we know, if anyone actually got a glimpse of how the Royal family really were, well they'd probably leave the country.