ONLY IF YOU KNEW, what she went thru

The taste.....

Aug 16, 2013

I remember when I did it. It feels like yesterday . The godawful taste of the metal's powder and the ringing in my ears. It was loud and very Mind job-align and my eyes grew big wondering what I had done. Looking and feeling dizzy I got up and walked to the bathroom where the bullet had gone. It had appeared going straight through the wall and I had no Idea where it was.

I tried to cover the whole through the door and through the wall but I couldn't. They noticed the white duck tape on the white wall.😂

  I knew I was in trouble then. I was thinking twice before I decided to take my life.  YEAH I said it. Before that very moment and those very wild and exotic incidents occurred I was going to put a whole in between my throat and my brain. But luckily the gun was jammed.

That's when this incident of the metal going off and the wholes appearing in the wall. I remember the alarm on the house going off when I shot it. I remember going to the draught to get the metal. And it was beautiful. Black all over, the thing that held the bullets was spiny and I felt the jell stuff at the end of one of the bullets. It was soft.

My brother came to me after I got in trouble and said he was very upset at me. Nobody knew exactly why I did it or what I planned on doing with the metal. Nobody knew but my brother only because I told him. He didn't believe me at first but in the end, it realized things wasn't as okay as they looked.

Don't get me wrong I'm strong and even stronger now but at the time I was alone and that was the answer to my problems.  Sixteen years old, I was ready to end it all.  But still today I still TASTE that awful metal's powder. And I remember the smell all over my hand and all in the room. You should of seen me spraying air freshner trying to get rid of the smell 😂