On The Edge Of It All

Chapter 1: A Year's Overview

To tell the truth, I don't know where to start. I know this is only supposed to go back a year but I could go back so much further. For the longest time people have told me I'm replicable, that I don't matter.

This year it's gotten worse, to the point my bright happiness has turned dark. To the point that I've contemplated death as an out. To the point I've written suicide notes. I've only been caught once, and that was a slap in the face since the person told me to do it. Just another time I've been reminded that I don't matter.

The biggest problem about this year is that it's gotten in my head and anytime anyone yells at me that's all I can hear, that I'm a worthless nothing.

Don't get me wrong, I have an okay life. I have a lot of things every kid would be happy with, but objects don't give happiness. I'm lucky to have the few friends I do or I would've been dead a long time ago. Sometimes I wish I had killed myself when the thought first occurred to me.

Honestly I used to be a lot more open to people but that was years ago. I don't know how to make my life better. I'm living inside a mental shell that's held up by everyo0ne seeming to tell me how useless I am. I'm stuck in a cycle; I go home and get yelled at for things I didn't do, I go to school I get laughed at for things I can't help.

I just want it to all end. I don't care how at this point, it's just all stupid. Life isn't for the weak and that's what I am.

A/N: I know this is short and it will get longer, this is more of an introduction chapter anyway. Next chapter will be short as well but I'm going to go ahead and post it since I have it typed in word anyway. I have a few chapters typed but I'm going to stagger the updates because I never know when I'll get to type/write in my notebook. Anyway, anyone who reads this thank you, and, if you want to, like and comment. That's all I have to say so see ya!