Don't Think Twice

Ch 35: A Crack in the Cement

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Chapter 35: Liam

                Airi tensed up instantaneously, something I was expecting. Even when aware of her hatred for situations like this, I had sunken her ship for the millionth time. I heard mum only a few steps behind us, drowsy and hungry, an interesting habit I had inherited long ago. I played it cool, letting my lips, with a mind of their own, scurry upon Airi’s chest. My button down that she wore slipped off her, uncovering her delicate shoulders. The dim light from the fridge stroked her skin, intensifying her visage. I wanted her right here, right now.

                From the corner of my eye, mum was downing a bottle of wine, her eyes focused on a loaf of bread in the pantry. I took her moment of distraction to my advantage, grabbing Airi and creeping up the stairs. Just as we reached the half way point, god bit me in the ass.

                The lights flickered on, mum with her hands crossed.

                A smile on her face.

                “Is this what all young couples do?” I scrunched my eyebrows in confusion when she walked to the pantry, her arm half way in… pulling out Merelise and Ashton, who were both flushed from head to toe.  

For the second time, Airi went a deep red.  She fumbled with the buttons, slipping most of them into the wrong holes, her mind solely on covering as much skin as she could.

                “What the hell are you doing here, Liam?” Merelise asked, tugging her shirt down to hide the unhidden.

                “I could ask you the same, now couldn’t I?” I turned to mom, about to make a witty comment when Airi interrupted me.

                “I’m so sorry Mrs. Alencar.” Her head still down, Airi ran up the stairs. An awkward silence had filled the once chaotic room. I glanced at Merelise and then at mom. They both stood with their hands crossed and an expression that had “idiot” written all over it.

                “Well don’t just stand here, go after her!” Merelise and mom yelled in unison.  I ran up the stairs without a thought, confused with what had just happened. When I walked in my room, Airi was perched on the bed, her head in her hands.

                “Airi, don’t cry. So my mom caught us having some fun, no big deal.”

                “I’m not f*cking crying.” She looked up, her eyebrows scrunched together with anger blaring in her eyes. “Liam, why do you make it so f*cking hard for me to look good in front of your family? I’m trying to make them see that I’m not a slut who fell under your charm and only wants you for sex. But you just keep getting in the way. Yeah we’re supposed to have fun from time to time but sometimes I wonder if you have nothing else in mind other than that.” Hearing those words were like a slap in the face. If she couldn’t realize the things I knew about us, then it was my turn to tell her exactly what they were.

                “Have fun? Sex? Airi, the first time I met you, it was pretty clear you weren’t much of the lovey dovey, sappy kind of girl. Our first f*cking conversation was about nothing but sex and let me not forget to comment that you had fair share in the dialogue. So I played along and tried to keep the relationship fun so I wouldn’t lose this,” I replied while my finger pointed to her and me. “Yeah, I have my moments where I want to kiss you, and hold you. I’m a guy for god’s sake; cuddling is a bare necessity.  Last time I check, girls dig that.” I was hoping she’d understand this but when the angry face didn’t smooth out, I knew I was in for more.

                “But that’s all you want to do. Kiss me, hug me, touch me, finger me. The list goes on and on.”

                “That’s all I f*cking do? Oh really? So you’re saying I didn’t spend almost a month trying to help you with your mommy issues? I sat there for hours talking to you, trying to make you feel better. Yes, I was in it for all the depression sex we had that entire month. Oh wait, we didn’t. Why? Because I wanted you to know I wasn’t the kind of guy who’s just waiting for the moment to get in your pants.”

                “Oh so now you’re regretting it because I don’t appreciate what you did for me and all I did was use you for the f*cking healing process.”

                “No you freaking moron, I didn’t mean it like that! I did all those goddamn things because I care! I love you! Probably more than that! I would do anything for you because I love you so much and you’ve shown me that you’re one girl I can trust to not break my heart! Airi, all those girls I dated were jokes, useless pin points in my life to keep me distracted. I was terrified that someone would break my heart like before. The fact that the person I loved the most could make my life miserable hell scared the shit out of me when it happened. But you didn’t do that! I’m still with you because I love the way you are and if my parents thought you were a f*cking slut, they would have lectured me day one. Why the f*ck do I have to tell you all this?!”

My chest heaved. All the build-up had finally cracked and broken down. My eyes stayed on hers, waiting to hear a reply. Her face was unreadable and she kept her hands in fists, her knuckles turning white. After a minute, she got up, walked to her suitcase, drew out some clothes, and walked to the bathroom. When she came out, she was wearing casual attire, my button down in one hand and her toothbrush in the other. She placed the once “alive” shirt on the bed and headed toward her bag where she zipped it up and pulled out the handle.

“I need to leave for a few days.”

“What? Why?”

“Because I need some time to think.”

“Hold on Airi, we can talk this out.” I wasn’t about to lose her just yet, to a petty fight we had especially.

“No Liam. This is why we have a problem. We’re together all the time. I need some time away from you to think about everything.” Rage consumed me for a second time.

“Where the hell are you going to go?”

“I have money and I’ve seen a bunch of taxis around here.” I rolled my eyes with bitterness and grabbed my wallet hands her 400 Reais.

“It’s the equivalent of 200 bucks. U.S. dollars don’t work here.”

“I’ll go to the ATM. I have a credit card.”

“Take the f*cking money, Airi.” Before she took it, she handed me two hundreds. I shoved them in my wallet and watched her walk out the door. Then before I could stop myself, I kicked the stray soccer ball on the carpet into the wall, making a small dent.

What the f*ck had I just done?

Song: Ass Back Home (Gym Class Heroes)