I wake up with Dan next to me, and he has his shirt off; obviously.
I never understood why he does it, but I guess he just feels more comfortable that way.
I sleep with my clothes on, because I feel like it's more simple.
But would you rather wear something comfortable to bed or nothing but your pants?
(That means Underwear. Get on my level.)I shift positions and lay on top of him, waiting for him to notice and wake up. But he doesn't wake up, he stays asleep. I nudge him, but his eyes don't open.
I push his shoulder a bit, and those beautiful brown eyes come into vision. He smiles and looks up at me.
"Why didn't you wake up? I know you're not a heavy sleeper." I shake my head.
"I liked the feeling so I wanted it to last a little longer." He smiles a big smile and I laugh.I get up off him and head to the kitchen. I hear him whimper in the distance. "Philllll come back and love me you sporkkk." I laugh and pick up a cooking book from a cabinet. I blow the dust off because this hasn't been used since Dan and I moved in together.
August 10th. I blush a bit.I remember all the times we spent together, and how sexually frustrated he made me feel almost every day, but I shake the thought away.
Life was kind of awkward back then.
I couldn't exactly tell Dan I had a huge crush on him. I mean, seriously? Could I have?
Probably not.
I should have, but maybe he didn't feel the same way. And it would have been awkward if he didn't. I must have done something in the last 5 years that changed his mind.
But what?It wasn't anything I could have done on purpose, right? I mean it's not like I planned for him to fall in love with me.
But there's one thing.
We're not in love.
We love each other, but I don't think he or I are in love.I love him. But am I in love with him?
Is he the one? Could he be?I look over at a picture of us in Jamaica, and think.
Maybe I am.
Is this what love is? What if feels like to be in love?He doesn't feel the same. He loves me, but not the way I hoped.
A part of me loves him, but another part of me wants to be in love, and I don't know if I can afford falling for him.
YOU ARE READING
The Boy With The Blue Eyes; Phan
Fanfictionbook two, to the 'boy' trilogy Phil discovers something, which leaves him to carry on with his life, but the discovery brings much more trouble.