Skins Generation 3

Matty

Life sucks. It is 5:09 am and all I can think of is how much life sucks. Miserable! I didn't get accepted anywhere. After 2 months of getting fired from every job in just a few days I gave up. I am useless. I haven't showwered in two weeks nor left my bed. I haven't left my room in a month,not even once. My room has a toilet in it plus Nick is bringing me food 3 times a day. Look at Nick! So smart,with a great social life,being the party animal I used to be and fucking the guys I used to beat up. I can't imagine how oppressed he was before for not even opening up about his sexuality. But now he is this totally different,crazy,positive,carefree guy! He saves me daily although I've been so shitty towards him. I know he sees Grace. He told me once when he was really wasted before he passed out. I was only seeing her in jail. Oh,yea I forgot to tell you. I spent 6 months in, thanks to my dad's money and good lawyers. But I had to serve them so I did. I had never been more alone. No one visited me but Nick. Nick would come every fucking day. Bringing me magazines and candy and telling me the news. And Grace would always be there when someone threatened me or was stealing from me or trying to get lucky with me,just staring at me like she was saying ''you deserve this for what you did to me''. But I didn't. And now I am free from jail. But not free from myself. Grace's parents were so kind and dropped the charges against me. Her dad told me that as much as he'd like to see me behind my prison cell,it wouldn't bring his daughter back. He's right and I am really glad he and mrs Blood decided this. Although sometimes I wish that I was still there,because people actually fucking talked to me. We were all lonely so we were seeking communication with each other. But now that I am not in college and I don't work what am I supposed to do? Grab someone in the street and ask him to be my friend like when I was 3? Or hangout with Nick's friend and chat about waxing their chests or worse, logarithms? The first months I tried everything to reach Franky. Now I think I can't even remember her voice. Mini and Alo are a fucking couple! And a kid! I am so curious to see what they look like as a family. What about Rich? How I hope he has a new girl or whatever he likes because after the scandal with Nick I can never be sure and that he's happy! Liv is the greatest girl ever. I hope this boy toy of hers,Alex,takes good care of her. I don't blame them for hating me. But truth is, I miss the days we would all just hang in the college's cafeteria and joke around,carefree and stupid. Damn you Grace. You ruined my life when yours ended.