You know how everyone says it was so much easier as a kid? No jobs, no taxes, no worries. Well, not for me, nothing is ever easy when you live in the south side. Here you learn to survive, not how to live, the Milkovich’s specifically. We are taught how to steal what we want, kill who is necessary and how to take care of ourselves. Being raised by Terry is one of the best and worst things that has, and will ever happen to me. Sure he’d beat me to death if I stepped outta lie but who says I don’t deserve it? People on the outside would call him abusive but what do they know? If it weren’t for him, all of us Milkovich’s would have to depend on people we hardly trust like everyone else. Although this is accurate, living with my father means living in pure misery. I don’t know what “happy” is anymore; I’ve never known what “happy” was. I’ve never been “okay” and I’m too fucked up to change that.
If it weren’t for Mandy, I think I would’ve shot myself by now. Even though she’s my obnoxious little sister, she means the world to me, but I would never admit that out loud. Today, she left early to meet up with her friend, Ian, before school. Ian Gallagher. He was tall, his hair like fire and muscular from his ROTC training. After Mandy brought him home for the first time, nothing made any sense. Now, listen, I’m no fag, but damn. I was abruptly awakened from my daydream when I walked in the school doors and saw Mandy and Firecrotch himself.
“Hey Mickey.” Mandy waved me over.
“Hey Mick.” Ian said with a smirk. I hate when he does that. It made me want to kiss hi- wait, what the fuck! When did I get so gay?
“Hey ass wipes.” I replied dully.
“Ian and I were gonna ditch first and second period, wanna come with?”
“Whattaya gonna do, have a picnic in the park or some shit?”
At that remark Ian laughed, shining his pearly white teeth. I refuse to say I want to kiss him, not because it’s “too gay” but because I want to do more than just that. I want to grab the back of his neck and slowly pull him near. I want to feel his heart race with anticipation. I want to lean in- and up because the kid was like a giraffe for Christ’s sake- and feel his soft, warm lips against mine.
“Um… Mick?” Mandy interrupted. “Whatever you’re thinkin’ about, you might want to stop.”
Confused, I turned my head toward her then down to the bulge, steadily growing in my pants. You’ve gotta be kidding me. Ian Gallagher was going to be the death of me.