Road to Someplace

Chapter Seventeen

 My ears were ringing, and my head throbbed with hot pulses. Raveena lifted her head up, her eyes red. Saliva dripped down her chin in trickles. She let out a sniffle. I found myself doubling over myself. I don't remember if I vomited or just gagged and coughed. Everything was in a blur of colors and fuzzy shapes. Every little noise ebbed away at me, only making me nauseous. I couldn't focus on anything. I remember stumbling around as paramedics arrived, pulling Tessa and Hailey's limp bodies out of the car. I vaguely recall falling on my face, dry grass cutting my cheeks as I flailed around. I tried to get back on my feet, to run after Tessa and Hailey, to see if they were okay. If they were alive.

I was somehow coaxed into calmly getting in the back of an ambulance. Hailey was on the stretcher, her eyes closed, her face and dress covered in splatters of blood. I found myself wrapped in a shock blanket. Sitting next to Hailey on a bench, I curled into a ball, breathing deeply into the fabric of the blanket as paramedics shouted to one another.

I remember going into the E.R., my breaths frantic as nurses crowded around Hailey. I found myself pulled aside by a nurse with dark hair and a soft, sad smile, her eyes full of understanding as I weakly reached out for Hailey.

I was by no means badly wounded. My head had a gash on it, and my arms and legs were riddled with bruises, but other than that, I, physically, was no worse for wear. I got some gauze on my head and had a few wound closers peppering my skin.

Soon, I was sat down in a chair, right next to Raveena. We didn't speak, but we gave each other looks of mutual despair. I could see the tears in her eyes, moisture gathering in her lower eyelid, glinting from the harsh white hospital lights. She let out a shuddering breath, uncharacteristically quiet. When she saw me staring at her, she tried to smile, only to start shaking, burying her face deep into her bandaged hands.

The next thirty minutes or so were tearful and full of hugs. At some point, Raveena and I fell asleep, my head resting on her shoulder.

I woke up to a gentle shake and a soft voice. "Marcas," The voice whispered. I cracked open my eyes, wincing at the sudden burst of light that hit my eyes. Blinking, I wiped at my eyelids, and stared into the person's eyes.

Sophia was crouched in front of me, her eyes red, whether it was from sleep depravation, crying, or both. Her hair was frizzy and disheveled. Mascara had collected under her eyes, creating dark, black bags under them. I could see traces of smeared lipstick around her mouth as well.

"How are you feeling?" She asked, her voice weak and hoarse, wavering with a complex weave of emotion and despair.

I took a moment to answer, too consumed by a haze of drowsiness and confusion. "I'm...I'm alright," I said, my voice unsure and barely above a whisper. I looked away, unable to gaze into Sophia's eyes for too much longer. The deep, rich browns of her eyes held so many thoughts and feelings. Every little movement or twitch of her pupil told me something different, the intensity of her gaze telling me something that she couldn't cover up. She was worried, upset, so distressed she could barely suppress the little drops of water from rolling down her cheeks.

I couldn't help but think back to the flashing, fuzzy images of the accident, the glimpses of Tessa and Hailey I managed to capture. I could recall bloody faces and limbs, closed eyes and small, weak, and desperate cries of pain. I felt like my heart was being stretched, leaving a burning pain in my chest.

I knew that Sophia was feeling the same, Raveena, Stewart, Ace, everyone, some of them probably even worse. It made me feel so small sometimes, knowing that everyone's mind was as complex as mine was, that everyone had thoughts, suffered, felt pain, felt the same sensation of their heart tearing apart, many much worse than what I felt. Just like me, all it took was a catalyst of trauma and tragedy, a cocktail of misfortune and loss to shake someone enough to their knees, for their mind to explode into despair, to their heart and ribs to feel like they're being slowing pulled apart.