The Shield Bearer

Chapter 17

Rene must have been staring. Because as Lawrence's laughter stopped, he locked eyes with her and without breaking eye contact made it clear that he could sense her thoughts. "When a woman looks at me that way, I know that she's thinking some very unladylike thoughts."

Her heart seemed to stop for a moment, as she was caught, thinking those 'unladylike' thoughts. She couldn't pull her eyes from his, as her cheeks grew warm, with what she suspected was a hearty blushing. Embarrassment stole any words that she could use in her defense, from her lips. And despite it all, she didn't really want to break eye contact with him.

She had hidden these kinds of feelings away, for so long, that she was tired of it. In her blind devotion to being a shield master, she had turned her back on the woman she was becoming. Well, she was a woman now, and she felt like one, for the first time that she could recall.

Lawrence chuckled lightly and freed Rene from his intense blue eyes. "If you are still feeling this way, after the ale has run it's course, then I'll gladly give you a demonstration of my skills." He smiled mischievously now. "I promised my father, that I would be a gentleman when I met you." His smile turned into a rather wicked grin. "I can be quite gentle, when needed."

Rene felt her entire face growing hot now. She struggled to get a word or two out past the lump in her throat. "I....uhm...It..."

Lawrence flashed her a warm smile this time. "Stop it. I can see that you are new to this flirting thing. It's okay, Rene. But you really shouldn't look at me like that, unless you want something, more than conversation."

Rene finally got her mouth to work properly. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have looked at you like that. You are just, uhm, a very handsome man."

Lawrence was still smiling. "Thank you." He shook his head in disbelief. "You have the body of a woman...but you are still a girl inside there, aren't you?" He finished off his ale. "How in the hell, could a woman as beautiful as you, never have experienced something as simple as flirting? Much less, the other?"

Rene thought about that for a moment. Many people had told her that she was beautiful. But she had never really equated that with attractiveness, despite the unwanted advances that she had occasionally had to deflect. She had never been pressured to be chaste. Not even the Priestesses of Astra were expected to be. It was expected that if she married, she would remain devoted to that man, true. But few soldiers married, at least not until they finished their active service.

So, why had she pushed every man she had ever dealt with into the category of friend or unwanted suitor? Maybe she had just turned all of that energy into her combat and spells. Or maybe it was because she had carried a secret crush on her teacher, Adam, to the exclusion of all others.

Lawrence got up and filled his stein again, then sat back down. "I think I get it." He took another long swig of ale. "You secretly had a thing for my dad, didn't you?"

Rene knew that she shouldn't drink anymore, but she also knew that a drink was the only thing that would loosen up her throat enough to answer. So she took a long drink and let the warmth of it, ease her anxiety. "I never told anybody, not even him." It felt like saying those words, lifted a burden from Rene's heart, that she hadn't even been aware she was carrying.

Lawrence nodded several times and then sighed heavily. "Well then, this really is awkward for you, isn't it?"

Rene nodded slowly. "You can't even begin to imagine."

Lawrence abruptly stood up from his seat and then planted both hands on the table. "So, you find me to be as handsome as my dad?" He looked directly at Rene again.