She's Not Afraid (1D)

Goodbye

**Taylor'sPOV**

My phone buzzed in my hand, the word "Pudding!" blaring from it, signalling a new tweet from a bandmember. I had turned notifications for them on.

I looked and saw that Jack had tweeted that he was hanging out with two awesome girls with an Instagram picture link. I quickly replied telling him I was going to murder him slowly and painfully.

My phone rang out again and I saw that he'd replied to me. I squealed, jumping up and down, waving my arms around. Everybody who was in the room looked at me weirdly until I sheepishly sat back down, grinning at Jack.

"I'm going to the bathroom," I announced, skipping out of the room. I had been getting hate nonstop on every social website I had, even my baby tumblr. I was having a hard time keeping up the happy façade.

I sat down on the toilet seat, pulling the small piece of metal out of my pocket. What was the point in even being alive anymore? Everybody hated me.

I pressed it to my skin, digging deeper than I ever had before. I let out a cry of pain, but kept going. I was tired, sick of everything.

"Goodbye," I whispered as the door flew open and the world went dark.

**Sophie'sPOV**

"What time is it?" I asked, yawning as I stretched my arms. Looking over at Rian for a responce. "It's just after 12, why?"

"Shit, we really need to get going" I rushed, climbing to my feet. Alex handing me my jacket, as I reached out for it. "Thanks"

"Do you really have to go?" Zack asked, reaching his arms out to me, bringing me closer to him. I rested my head on his shoulder, squeezing tight. Never wanting to let go "Trust me, I would much rather stay here with you guys"

"Why? What about your boyfriend?" Vic raised an eyebrow at me in curiosity, also reaching out to me for a hug. "What about him?"

"Well wouldn't you rather go back to him?"

"Well yeah, but I spend everyday with him. You guys I mean, your my idols" I blushed as they cooed at my comment, Jaime pinching my cheeks in his fingers. "You are so adorable. Were be staying in touch with you, no doubt about it"

I gave them all another hug before grabbing my purse from the table and running into the bathroom to find Taylor. "Jerry, time to go my young friend"

I felt the colour in my face fade, as my heart stopped. The air I was breathing, trapping in my throat as my chest grew tight. Blood stained the clear, white bathroom floor along with an arm laid across the floor, the rest of it leading into the cubicle. Instantly noticing Taylor's red hair trailing across the top half of the arm.

Screaming I ran from the room, everybody's head instantly lifting up to look at me.

"Sophie?"

"What's wrong?"

"Where's Taylor?"

Tears blurred my vision, me jumping up into the arms of the closest person, as their arms locked onto me I knew it was Tony. "Call an ambulance. Taylor, she's..."

My voice wobbled, trailing off not being able to finish the sentence. I saw out the corner of my eye, both the Alex's sprinting into the bathroom. Vic reaching for his phone. "Hello? Yes, I need an ambulance"

**Taylor'sPOV**

Everybody always assumes death is peaceful. They know nothing. It's painful, but it's worth it. Death means freedom.

Nobody would be weighed down by my existence.

Nobody would have to see my face.

Nobody would have to pretend to care.

Nobody would shed a tear.

Everybody would be happy.

Everybody would be okay again.

**Sophie'sPOV**

"You need to call them though" Derek persisted to tell me, as Alex Gaskarth rocked me gently in his arms as Taylor was wheeled into the back of an ambulance once again, my face blank as I watched the doors close. "I'm not calling them"

"I'm calling them then" Derek snatched my phone from my pocket, me not bothering to argue I let him take it. I suppose he was right, the boys did need to know.

My eyes drifted towards Vic and Mike who were currently talking to the three men that were taking Taylor's information. "I want to go with her"

"Sophie, you know you won't be allowed" Alex sighed, gently wiping away at the tears that laid still on my cheeks. "Watch me"

Pushing past Alex, I made my way over to the back of the vehicle, swinging open the doors. Grabbing the handles I used the remaining strength in my arms to pull myself inside, before waving to the boys who just stared at me with shocked expressions. Slamming the doors closed, I crawled into the corner besides Taylor's stretcher, and just sat there. Crying.

**Taylor'sPOV**

When I was five, if someone asked whether I wanted to live or die, I would've said live.

When I was ten, I would've asked what the person asking was on, of course I wanted to live.

When I was thirteen, I would've lied, said live when I knew I didn't.

Now, nobody could ask me a thing.

**Sophie'sPOV**

I felt something cold and wet splash across my cheek, startling me as I lifted my hand up to my eyes, rubbing them gently before opening them. I saw the blurred hospital signs in front of me and I could feel someones tight grasp on my body tighten as I squirmed around slightly, still in shock as to where I was and what was happening. I heard someone 'shh' me before stroking a hand through my hair, I almost automatically knew it was Vic.

I looked around at everyone who was stood around staring as Vic held me in his arms, I was suprised he could even carry me to be honest, he was so small. I fixed my grip around his neck as I snuggled my head back into the crook of his neck. I just wanted to go to sleep.

Another wet drop hit my nose, slowly sliding down it and falling to the floor. Opening my eyes I tilted my head backwards as I glanced up at the sky, squealing when the rain started to thunder down over us all. "Here you take her" I felt someone elses grip fasten itself around my waist as I was lifted into the arms of supposedly Rian before he erruptedly ran to join the others under cover,

"You alright?" He asked me as he placed his hand on my head as I rested my chin on his shoulder. "What's going on?..." I closed my eyes, before feeling myself slowly drift away again.

"Sophie?" I heard his voice call.

"Har..." And I was gone.

**Taylor'sPOV**

Silence was thick in the air as soon as I opened my eyes. I was laid on a hospital bed and Sophie was by my side. "How am I alive?" I asked her, sitting up. I looked at my wrists and frowned. They were bare. No scars or cuts.

My pale skin didn't stand out of the white material of the dress I was wearing. It took a moment for that to sink in before I gasped, looking at my clothes.

I was wearing a plain white dress that flowed out at the waist. There were no shoes on my feet, though.

I swung my leg off the bed and shook Sophie's shoulder. "Please explain," I begged. She didn't reply, she just continued to stare behind me. Confused, I turned around only to face me.

I screamed, stumbling back, excepting to hit the ambulance wall, instead tumbling through it. I hit the floor and was in shocked silence for a moment before a car came speeding towards me. I squeezed my eyes shut, preparing myself for impact. Only none came.

After a few moments of nothing, I opened my eyes. There was no car anywhere near me. I looked behind me and saw it speeding off into the distance.

"What's going on?" I cried, hitting the ground with my palms. There was a tugging sensation before I started getting pulled away from where I was sat.

Everything quizzed past before I found myself outside of a hospital. I stepped inside and walked over to the woman at reception, asking her if she could help me. She didn't even look up.

It reminded me of something, but I couldn't quite put my finger on it. I looked around for any clue that might help me know why I was here.

As I searched my eyes landed on a familiar set of hair that I had fangirled over a lot. "Hime-time?"

He stood up and wiped his eyes before heading for the elevator. Quickly, I ran after him, making sure that I wouldn't lose him. "Why, why, why," He muttered to himself as the doors closed. "why did this have to happen?"

"I don't even know what's going on, baby-boo."

**Sophie'sPOV**

They wouldn't let me stay with her any longer. They said they needed to do their job and bring her back to us. But I knew the truth, she wasn't coming back. She was gone. Gone forever. And I was alone. Alone forever.

I heard people speaking but to me it just sounded just like burbles, nothing made sense to me anymore. Why should it? The person who meant most to me is gone. And she's never coming back. No matter what people say. She won't be back.

I felt numb, I couldn't feel anymore. Nothing felt real. I could see the blurs of faces around me but I didn't acknowledge them. I didn't feel the need. One day, they would all be gone and I would be eternally alone. Nobody to tell me things would be alright. Nobody to reassure me. Nobody to guide me through. One day they would all leave me, just like she did.

I could feel myself moving, but where I don't know. I just closed my eyes and buried my face into the warm material that was rubbing against my cheek. I didn't want to see the world anymore. The world is just full of hate and all I ever do is let people down. That's why they leave me. Nobody ever stays by me. Is there something wrong with me? There must be or I wouldn't be in this situation.

Cold air whipped at my body, causing me to shiver. Somebody placed their hand to my head, stroking their fingers through my hair, whispering soft words in my ear. Words I didn't understand, because they were all just lies. She wasn't coming back, I knew she wasn't coming back. So why tell me she is? Why try to feed my mind with such cruel lies? Does it make you feel better about yourself, to see another suffer? If it does, then you must all be feeling amazing right now. Cos I'm pretty much dying.

**Taylor'sPOV**

"Sophie, I'm so sorry," I whispered, standing beside my best friend as a tears fell down her face. Her head snapped up and she furiously searched everyone's faces, eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

"Sophie?" I asked. A shrill scream passed her lips and I flinched, staring wide eyes into her eyes.

"Taylor?" She asked shakily.

And then I was dragged away by an unknown force. An hour later I opened my weary eyes.

**Sophie'sPOV**

"No Phil, you don't understand" I croaked, burying myself under the cold, unknown duvet of the hotel bed. "I heard her voice, I know I did"

"Sophie, I just think it would be better if you went to sleep" He repeated, stroking a hand through my hair as I stared blankly in the opposite direction. "I can't sleep knowing she's gone"

He sighed before squeezing my arm comfortingly and getting up from the bed. "See you in the morning okay? Dan and I are in the room next door if you need anything. Pete and Andy are coming back soon, they will be in the next room okay? So don't worry, someone will be in to make sure your okay in about an hour" I didn't reply, instead I just continued to stare mindlessly at the wall, wanting to hear her voice again. I know I heard her, I was certain I could feel her near me.

Hearing the sound of the door shut, I almost instantly felt alone, stroking the space on the bed next to me with the palm of my hand. I began to wonder where Harry and the rest of them were, and why they weren't here with me.

Maybe they finally felt guilty for feeding me lies, telling me they cared. Everybody knows that if you care about someone, you don't leave. So why were the people that were telling me they cared, leaving me in an instant. Without even saying goodbye.

**Taylor'sPOV**

I don't believe in heaven and hell. I believe that we will just wait to be joined by those we love, and once we are we can all be together again.

I believe that in time, physical scars will heal if you give them enough time, but emotional scars might not.

I have many scars, physical and emotional and none seem to have healed fully yet, but I feel that if I gave them enough time, they might.

There's one problem, though.

I don't know how much time I have.