Hell of a Ride

Third Trimester Fuck With Me

Finally! We are now in the home stretch! The end is near & I can't wait to be done! Seriously... Have you ever pulled you vagina... No, well LET ME TELL YOU, it's the most painful thing ever. Not to mention the constant hip & pelvic pain, back aches, slightly peeing yourself when you sneeze or cough & the lovely sciatic nerve pain. If all that's not bad enough there's the heartburn, getting kicked in he ribs by that sweet babe & also being short of breath all the time. Sleepless nights because getting comfortable is damn near impossible. Try waking up everytime you roll over because you PULLED YOUR VAGINA! Okay not really my vagina more like my hip leading to my lady parts... But round that shit up & it mind as well been my cat.

The holidays we a much as a success as they could have been. Thanksgiving & Christmas were uneventful... Well Christmas was interesting... STORY TIME!

So it's Christmas & Steve, Lucifina & I are at there dads house. (Side note, Lucifer didn't set up a tree until like 3 days before Christmas. He told me Lucifina & I were in charge if decorating it. Mind you I'm pregnant as fuck! So did Lucifina help carry anything in... Nope. That bitch sat her ass on the couch while I did... Lifting & dragging boxes into the house from the garage was so difficult. I literally started having Braxton hicks contractions... It's okay princess twat waffle I got it. I seriously hope that she has to deal with the same shit I've dealt with from her. Anyway so I get everything in the house. Lucifina's laying on the couch barking orders, "The lights on this side are too low... You need more ornaments over here. That's ugly you should redo it.".... You miss should shut your mouth or do it yourself... See the thing with her is she never has to lift a finger. Even when asked to do something she just lays her lazy ass I the couch & ignores you, until you finally give up & do it yourself..) Any way, so we're at their dads & he atmosphere is blah.. Mainly because they're dad is a psychopath. I swear he throws a fit, throws things, slams doors, yells at you, gets in your face, then 2 seconds later acts like nothing happened... So naturally I'm on my phone ignoring these asshole people. Which is what everyone is doing. It was so forced, Steve's dad is upset because him & his medicine woman girlfriend broke up, Lucifina is off in her world, probably wondering why no one wants to date her... I think she's a lesbian.. Or it might be because she's a fake bitch... Anyway We wrapped up this amazing ( Rolls eyes) time with his dad, who is sad because his ex wife is engaged & happy & he's alone & miserable... It's your attitude... Anyway we head to Steve's moms.

The dynamic over there isn't any better. Steve's mom, we'll call her Martha for this story, is engaged to stranger danger. They got engaged about a week before Christmas. It was the most awkward engagement I've ever witness.. It was a family bomb fire/bbq. We're all sitting around the fire. I get a call from Steve & we are arguing because he want to procrastinate our baby shower & is making me the middle man instead of talking to people directly.. Anyway I'm ready to jump through this phone & slap the shit outta him, instead I hang up because his mom is calling me over. I return to the fire & she calls Steve puts him in speaker phone & stranger danger starts with this speech about how he loves her & can't live with out her. Mind you, they meant in plenty of fish (a dating website) moved in together after 3 weeks, literally he came to stay the weekend once & never left... They haven't even known each other for a year. It's only been a few months. But here she is getting engaged, while I'm over here having almost 4 years & a soon to be baby under our belts & I still don't have a rock on my finger... Anyway he's half way through his speech, Steve literally hung up the phone, Martha has not made eye contact with him, has not taken his hand or anything. She's literally sitting there all awkward. He finally asks her to marry him & she says yes.. He says I love you & goes in for a kiss & she's like "not now..." What?! It was so awkward.. Lucifina is crying, i hug her because unlike her I'm a compassionate person.. She claims to be happy for her mom & loves stranger danger, which baffles me because every word outta her mouth has been how she hates him & how he's gots to go... Hell even the day before she was sayin she didn't like him... Fake much? Come to find out stranger danger is paying for some of her college so that's why she all of a sudden "likes" him...