Septiplier One Shots

Raise your hands

"I'm just trying to raise a family."

Under any other circumstance this sentence may seem innocent enough. Maybe it's just a really tired, single mom and all she wants is for you to take her expired coupon so she can keep going on with her day.

"I'm just trying to raise a family," she would say holding out the coupon, hair unkempt and greasy. Odds are, if you're anyone with a heart, you'll accept the coupon so she can get her discounted food and make it home in time to get the youngest down for a nap and the oldest off the school bus.

But this isn't normal circumstances. So this sentence isn't normal. Because you were honestly just trying to put some flowers on your great grandma's grave because your mom asked you to do it for her last time you visited. See you were just walking when suddenly a guy dressed in all black was hovering a couple inches off the ground and was in your way. He'd glared over at you with precious blue eyes, "What are you looking at buddy?" he'd snapped, "I'm just trying to raise a family!"

-

Mark turned around. He's not sure what he's looking for, an explanation probably. Something to explain why there was a guy floating in front of him that looked like he was straight of a crappy cult horror movie from the 60's. Maybe like a camera crew that would jump out or some sort of prank for a new MTV show. Nothing happened except a couple leaves blew around.

He turned back to the guy who was still hovering and glaring at him. Mark blinked a couple times trying to figure this out, he felt his tongue get dry. When had he opened his mouth?

Snapping it shut with an audible clink, he swallowed and gathered his thoughts to form an educated question based on his surroundings, "What the absolute fuck?"

The man sighed and lowered to the ground, "Well now you've broken my concentration, thanks by the why it only two hours of mediation to get to the right frame of mind to be able to raise this turd from the ground."

Mark nodded as if this made perfect sense, "And um why," he asked looking around the guy to see the name on the grave, "are you raising Denis Williams?"

The man lowered his hood and for the first time Mark could fully see him. He didn't look anything like the images his mind was making up. He was young, around his age actually. He looked just like any other guy you'd ever see, minus the fact he had green hair. Not that he cared about something like that, he thought running a hand through he dyed hair, he was more concerned with the fact that he was raising the dead. If TV taught him one thing about life it was that dead people walking around is never good thing.

"Well if you must know this guy, and his family, founded the town a couple hundred of years ago and I need to ask him questions for my final exam essay."

Mark stared at him and formed his lips in an O-shape. So this guy was just a a really enthusiastic student, he can appreciate that, "So," Mark mumbled not quiet sure how to continue, "How did you um...learn to do this?"

The guy raised a hand to rub his forehead, "My grandmother was big into all this back in Ireland and—, look buddy I don't need to explain this to you."

Mark raised his hands, "Just curious. Up until seven minutes ago I was pretty sure magic wasn't real."

The guy laughed, "Bet you don't believe in fairies either."

Mark looked horrified,  "Fairies exist?"

"Well where do you think magic comes from?" the guy laughed and held his hand out, "Name's Sean but everyone called me Jack."

Mark shook his hand, "Mark but everyone calls me Mark."

"Cheeky, I like that in my men."

"Good thing because I only date necromancer and you wouldn't believe how hard it is to come across a decent one," Mark shot back. He felt his earlier thoughts of the appending apocalypse start to dissipate and let himself start to relax, "So can I watch?"