500 Days of Freya (Merlin)

Honour

Chapter 9

Warning/s: Nothing.

Disclaimer: I don't own Merlin or any of the characters etc.

A/N: This is a prompt from ruapilot2 - "Merlin pays Elyan to make a grave marker a for Freya's lake."

To be honest, I'm not sure how good this one is. I wrote it in an hour, and I was satisfied with it at the time, but now looking back at it, I'm not entirely sure. But I didn't want to keep you guys waiting any longer, so...

Merlin took in a deep, shuddering breath. The conversation he was about to have was not going to be easy but he had to have it at some point. It was the right thing to do.

"Elyan?" he asked, hovering in the doorway of the armoury. The dark-skinned man started and laughed when he saw Merlin, pressing a hand to his heart.

"Merlin!" he smiled. "You scared me half to death!"

Merlin returned the smile nervously. He began to rub at the back of his neck like he always did when he was anxious. "Can I ask you something?" he blurted.

"Of course, Merlin, you always can." Elyan set the sword he had been sharpening down on the table in front of him, seeming to sense either how serious the situation was or how worried Merlin was.

"I need a grave marker." Merlin bit his lip, struggling to repress the tears that always threatened to escape when he thought of Freya. He registered the shock on Elyan's face and hastened to add, "It doesn't have to be really fancy or anything, just something simple-"

"That's...not why I'm shocked, Merlin." Elyan shook his head in disbelief. "I didn't know you'd lost someone recently. I'm...deeply sorry."

"It wasn't recent," Merlin replied, looking down at his feet. He could see his toes twitching nervously. "I just never thought of it before."

"Gods, Merlin, I don't know what to say...I mean, of course I'll do it, but...who is it for? So I can include a name?"

"Her name is – was – Freya. She wouldn't have wanted anything special or amazing, she didn't think she was worth much, but she was." A solitary tear dripped from Merlin's face and he cursed himself for his weakness. He heard Elyan shuffle towards him and wrap an arm around his shoulders.

"The people we love are always worth the world to us," Elyan said softly. "I'll keep it simple, if that's what you want, but I'll make sure it's special."

"Thank you," Merlin whispered. "How much do you want for it?"

"Nothing. You're a friend and I'm not charging." Elyan dropped his arm and clapped Merlin on the shoulder. "I understand if you don't want to talk about her, but I'm available if you do." He hesitated. "Does anyone else know about her?"

"No. Nobody...not really." Merlin sniffed and made an effort to lift his head and smile at Elyan.

"I think you should. You and Arthur are close, even if he keeps denying it...did you know him when Freya died?"

"No, nobody can know." Merlin sighed and leant against the oaken doorframe. "It's complicated."

Elyan nodded, at a loss for words, and stepped from the armoury with a final smile and another clap to his shoulder. "I'll make it tonight – is there any type of flower you want carved on it?"

"Can you do strawberries?"

Elyan looked surprised, and confused, but his tone was even when he responded, "Of course."

Merlin was sitting on his bed, still dressed in his work clothes. Arthur, for some reason unknown to him, had released him from his duties early and he had been able to spend the afternoon practicing magic safely. His mind had been on Freya ever since the conversation with Elyan two days ago, and it had caused him to be in a deep melancholy. Maybe that was why Arthur had let him go earlier today.

Flicking through his spell-book, his eyes picked out one that seemed interesting. It gave the user the ability to control a fire that had been created by magical or non-magical means, allowing the user to amplify or reduce flames, or spread them to wherever they want. That would be useful on hunting trips.

Merlin hummed as he bookmarked the page and carried on reading. The Old Religion always made him feel more relaxed somehow; the shapes of the letters were a soothing influence, for some reason.

From outside his room and closed door, he could hear muffled voices. He assumed it was Gaius and one of his patients complaining about some ailment or another, and resumed his reading once he came to that conclusion.

There was a sharp rap at the door, making Merlin jump out of his skin and nearly off the bed. He chucked the heavy book on the floor and threw his jacket over it to disguise it. "Yes?" he questioned, sliding off the bed to hurry to the door.

"It's me, Elyan," came a voice on the other side of the door. Merlin swung the door open, anticipation flooding his body as he saw the load that Elyan was carrying: a large block of something covered with an off-white cloth.

"Come in," Merlin said, glancing past the knight as he ducked into his room, and grinning when he saw Gaius' raised eyebrows.

"Well, what do you think?" Elyan said, setting the stone down on Merlin's bed and removing the cover. Merlin closed the door behind him and bounced over to his bed, eager to see the grave marker.

It was marble, a luxurious stone, smooth and beautiful. 'Freya' was carved into it with a smooth hand, the font even and swirling. Just as Merlin had asked, a bunch of strawberries had been clearly impressed under her name and the rest of the stone was blank, apart from the smaller words at the bottom: 'In Loving Memory'.

Merlin felt tears sting at the back of his eyes again, but forced them back. "It's perfect," he said genuinely, turning to face Elyan. "It's perfect, she'd love it."

"Glad I could help a friend," Elyan said softly, admiring his own work. "Oh, Arthur saw me making this, just to let you know. I didn't say any more than I had to, I just told him it was for you and it was a loved one who had passed away a while ago, and you don't like to talk about it. He said he wouldn't ask you about it."

It made sense now – his afternoon off. "Thanks for letting me know."

"I've got to get back to training – Arthur's called an unexpected one, in five minutes, I don't want to be late." Elyan strode back towards Merlin's door.

"Elyan – thank you for this, honestly, and if there's anything I can do to repay you, I will. And would you say thank you to Arthur as well? He'll understand." Merlin smiled, looking back at the grave marker.

"I will do," Elyan smiled, and retreated from his room, closing the door softly after him.

Merlin wedged the stone into the ground by the Lake of Avalon, with a little assistance from his magic. It was a cool day, and the lake was rippling slightly with the breeze. "There you go, Freya," Merlin said, satisfied with his job. He cast a protection spell over the stone so no wear would come to it, intentional or not. "Honoured at last."

He could have sworn that the lake turned a deeper shade of blue, just for a moment, before resuming its normal shade. Merlin left to return to Camelot much happier than before. Finally, he had honoured her memory.

A/N: I feel like that last line is slightly creepy. Maybe just because I've been rewatching season 1 of Hannibal lately. (If you've watched it, you'll get it.)