I know you're all probably so confused. Why am I sad you're probably wondering.
I guess every story needs it's base, so I'll give you a little taste of what exactly happened to my pathetic self.
My name is, hmm let's go with a simple Hayley, and I basically fucked up my life to the most fucked up way you could possibly every fuck it up, kinda, well let's go with friendship wise. Why now? Why do I choose to possibly open up now? Cause I'm not scared of my old friends anymore, I'm not scared of being judged since I no longer am friends with those people.
It all started about a year ago, everything was as perfect as it could possibly be, I had my two best friends and my group of pals, all of us together was basically unstoppable.
Kel and Zachariah were my best buds, my amigos, my tacos, my superglued asshole mates who I loved beyond hell. Kel and I had been friends since we met wayyyy back in 10th grade. That's when I first joined her high school and was forced to sit in the front of class near her so I could shut up. Since then we basically became inseparable. Kel was an amazing best friend, I mean she had her shitty habits but her caring personality with memes and love out weighed all her flaws.
Zachariah however, hah, we started from 11th grade when she first joined my school as the new kid. She was loud, irritating and frankly too dicky for me. I hated her at first, I was more of the quiet type you see, and well, she was the opposite of me so I was pretty annoyed by her presence.
Although we kicked it off pretty good during an OT class one day when I found out she was into the same music that I loved. We grew pretty damn fond of each other after that.
Now high school wasn't all bad, I mean fuck, I enjoyed my time with all those bastards cause honestly, they all made me happy. I'd been through my rough patch with relationships and all that crap, but my friends were always there for me.
Seems all perfect right? WRONGG BUDDY. Why? Oh I'll tell you why. Cause Hayley over here had a weakness for love. Yes I am a loser who can't help but fall in love with the wrong person and mess everything up by getting too attached and losing all my friends in the process.
How? You maybe be wondering. I'll tell you how.
******
So I'm in 12th grade, we're skipping a year or two here past the good old times to the main juicy part of the story which is where I fucked up.
Anyways, so Zachariah and I may have dated ok? Yeah well we dated and btw zac isn't a guy, it's a girl. A very talented, beautiful and bad ass girl who managed to win me over to the gay side of things. Yes, I'm bisexual. Fast forward her and I became more than just best friends, we became girlfriends.
I loved that girl I'll tell you that much. But we weren't quite compatible it seemed so things didn't work out. Plus everything was lowkey and im more of a highkey attention craving girlfriend so I couldn't deal. We ended and so did a part of our friendship, but we did get over it for the sake of all our friends. We didn't want anyone to think they'd have to take sides.
Around two weeks after we broke up I met a guy, let's call him Dick. Now Dick was basically my rebound, he made me feel better about all that had happened and basically swooped in on my life to be that shoulder I could cry on. I was blinded by pain and simply vulnerable to anything that showed me affection. I fell for him instantly without thinking, and honestly it was probably the worst mistake of my life.
Dick was all nice in charm with his great award winning personality that was so big it could probably anal his own asshole, but deep down he was a fucking cheating cunt who just wanted to get into a girls pants.
He did exactly that with me, yes, round of applause everyone. Hayley is also a dumb cunt who lost her virginity to your average fuck boy.
Not only did I do that, I drifted away from my friends during the relationship period with Dick. I went out clubbing and I'd miss school alot, plus I started smoking and shit like that.
My friends were so disgusted and disappointed in me but dang that didn't stop me! Nope hayley just kept at it with the dumb decisions.
Eventually he cheated and I realised what I had become, but by then it was too late and I had already somewhat lost all that I had. I lost Kel, I hurt Zachariah's feelings beyond fix and I had disappointed everyone around me.
School became harder for me, no matter how much I tried to fit in it just seemed as though I wasn't wanted anymore.
Slowly and slowly my depression came back and I just couldn't deal with it.
I held onto what ever friendships I could save, but only zac seemed to care anymore. I had done the impossible, I had lost everything.
Now you're probably wondering what happened to me, I don't blame you I'm the main character of this story. Well I went on to quit school.
Yes, I did what you're probably hoping the main character of a story wouldn't do. I gave up.
I left school cause of family issues and simply cause I didn't have enough will power to face everyone.
I miss them all, so so much.
I still talk to zac from time to time. But I can't help but feel sad about the past. I wish I could just fix everything.
******
SO you probably noticed I'm continuing this story.
I'm free hand typing as I think so excuse the mistakes.
I'll probably do a next chapter in a few days so, bye
-Hari
