September's Staircase [On Hold]

Chapter 35

It's the same dream again we dance and he laughs when I step on his foot calling me clumsy before leading me to the dinning room. Hernia brings me the lavender sweater and I thank her by her name just this time she address me as Lady Elizabeth before scurrying out of the room closing the heavy door shut behind her. I make to reply her but nothing leaves my mouth and I can feel the shift as it happens it's an odd feeling to be present in your body but to have no control.

I've felt this happen before in the library with Matty it's an unnerving feeling like I'm standing at the inside of a cave watching out through the clear encloser of water that's falling over the opening of the cave, crashing down in front of me and leaving me trapped in its cocoon with an disoriented view of beyond the cold rock walls.

I'm here, I see it all through my eyes and hear it all through my ears but it's not me it doesn't feel like me and when I pick up the silverware to begin eating I catch a glimpse of myself, blonde hair so fair it makes you think of the sun's kisses a stark contrast to the black of mines that embodies the night. A flash of green eyes like the bleached tendril leaves of grass fields opened to the summer sun unlike the cold blue of mines like the dreary color of winter.

I feel myself panic and I try to reach out and run my hand through my hair or stand up to react in some kind of way. But the body- my body remains calm and I find my view turning from silver cutlery to the stormy sea, Kaspian is observing me quietly and the corners of my mouth tilt up to offer him a smile. "Pray tell beautiful what took you so long" An empty laugh echos off the stone walls-my empty laugh but Kaspian closes his eyes filing into memories like it's his favorite song, scratch that his favorite album.

"Oh how I've missed you My Kas," the voice is smooth like fine wine aged to perfection, the voice a lady can easily use to catch prey. On its own accord the green orbs roam his body eyeing him up and down before a low hum of appreciation makes its way up my throat it falters and changes to a quiet sob and he's up on his feet in a second wrapping his python arms around her- I mean me and kissing my cheeks and nose and forehead soothing me reassuring me that we'd be together soon but that I must go and just like that I'm awake.

My body shakes with one last sob brought through from my dream and I place my hand on my chest to try and compose myself. Breathing in I reach across and click on the lamp on the mirrored nightstand and almost jump out of my skin when I look at my hand, covered in some foreign liquid the color of contaminated tap water from a rusted pipe before it runs clean.

It's thicker than water almost like blood and when I rise off the bed to go to my ajoining bathroom I realize that most of my body is covered in it almost like sweat but it's mixed in with cerulean blue splashes and when I turn back around my entire sheets are soaked though by it.

I reach down to yank the sheets off and I'm startled by how cold the liquid is as if on cue my body shivers and my teeth begins to chatter. God I'm going insane. What is this ? Dropping the sheets in the dirty hamper I feel around the bathroom wall until the place illuminates with the dull glow of the light and when I meet my reflection in the mirror, it's disgusting but even through the grim of the substance I still make out the streak of golden locks between the black of my hair.

Elizabeth. I don't know what's happening but I know it's her, in my dream- if it was even one the remnants of blonde hair makes me beg to differ. I stagger to the shower turning the heat all the way up before settling myself on the floor, knees to chest under the hot spray of water. After Matty had told me her name I had spent the evening riffing through centuries worth of files with an uncharacteristically quiet Matty until finally finally I got something on her.

Lady Elizabeth with a bunch of records of her contribution to our town more so her  lover's contribution Sir Kaspian Healy. So he does in fact exist or was in fact real at some point in time. How I knew his name before any of this is beyond me. The most interesting thing I did discover was pictures about ten in total all of Elizabeth and the young man from the pictures who has been haunting my dreams whether or not it was him who Alec and I really saw the other night is still is mystery to us both. The whole idea of ghosts or dare I say vampires existing seems almost to comical to contemplate.