Creating Me - Eremin

Chapter 17: [[END]]

a/n: so. it's been nine months. im so sorry. but here it is, the end, the final, the conclusion. at the end, there's gonna be a really long sappy authors note but for now; enjoy.

My name is Armin Arlert, I am 16 years old, and I am very, very happy.

I'm not always happy, and I don't expect myself to be. But I'm happier than I was, and I'm as happy as I ever have been. Of course, there are still days when I can't bring myself to get out of bed, or when I just have to sit and cry, but they're less. I'm making progress, and I'm very proud.

Six months ago, I had top surgery. It was simultaneously one of the best and scariest moments in my life. Looking back on it, I feel so lucky to have been given the opportunity that I was, so lucky to have my amazing best friends, so lucky to be alive. My chest is flat now, and my scars have mostly healed, just two pink lines sitting a touch below my nipples.

Eren and I are still together, which is possibly the best part of all this. He has supported me through thick and thin, from when I was a complete, utter mess, to where I am now. I owe him a great deal.

I owe Mikasa nearly just as much. She's been there for me since our first meeting in Eren's bedroom, always standing as sturdy as a great tree in a storm. She's stood by my side, protecting me, joking with me, helping me along the way, and I am proud to call her my best friend.

There are still nightmares that come, sometimes. They're few and far between, these days, but they're still there. I used to wake up from those alone, clammy and terrified, clutching at my bedsheets for an anchor. Now, I wake up to a warm body at my side and a tanned arm around my waist. Now, I can curl up into the boy beside me and anchor myself there. 

My name is Armin Arlert, and I've come a long way.

++++++++++++++++++++++++

alright so! that's it. that's the end. fin. it's done.

i wanted to make this longer but quite honestly i don't know what else i could say, and you know what that means. that means its time for the big sappy authors note.

first off, thank you to all of you who have read this fic, commented on it, voted it up, you guys mean the absolute world to me. i have read every single one of the 400-something comments on here, and they make me smile every time. 

second of all, i want to put it out there that i am not very proud of this fic.

it was one of my very first, and is now the first one ive ever brought to conclusion, and compared to my writing now, and most writing out there.... its not very good. the plot is boring, the dialogue is amateur, and the prose in general is just.. not up to my standards now, which is part of the reason ive been so late updating it.

that being said, im not going to edit this fic in any way. why? because i quite like it as a time capsule of my life during the time i was writing this. this fic has seen me through a lot. during the period that i was regularly updating this, i: came out to my parents as trans, started high school, made new friends, got into other things, and grew a lot as a person. i read through this fic again today, and i could remember what was happening in the time i wrote it. it was very interesting, and very fun.

this fic has, at the time im writing this, over eight and a half thousand views. that's crazy, thank you all so much for reading this. I will no longer be publishing works of any kind on wattpad, but feel free to check my out on archiveofourown (psychojuuzou), tumblr (keijisthighs), and twitter (tododelcu). in the next month, i will be uploading a long (like over 10k words probably) tododeku (from bnha) oneshot to ao3, as well as a bokuaka fic, and a continuation of a kagehina fic im working on (both from haikyuu). 

in case you guys don't know, i'm mainly an artist! you can learn more about that on my twitter and tumblr, but here's some examples for now:

this was drawn about a year ago and is, much like this fic, not up to snuff with my current standards for myself:

and here's some of my recent stuff:

so this is it. i thank you all for joining me on this wild ride, and i hope to see you around!

my name is charlie, and i too, have come a long way.