The Time Capsule (Old Version)

Chapter Thirty

^^^Because of this amazing girl, you guys got an update. I'd be thanking her if I were you!

James

The day she broke up with me sixteen years ago I was happy. I thought that I’d finally get that weird feeling of love for her tossed away. What can I say, I was a stupid fourteen year old. But now that she rejects me once again, well, this time around it definitely hurts more. “I guess I understand,” I mumble, looking down at my plate.

I hear her sigh, “James look at me.” I don’t move, “look at me,” she repeats and this time I slowly meet her eye, slightly worried about what she’d say next. “This past week you’ve been a total sweetheart. I was the one that was pushing you away and I’m sorry for that. I guess I never really got closure from what you did to me so long ago. But everything you’ve done…the breakfast in bed, playing cards, this” she motions to the table and all the set-up, “It’s been awhile since I’ve been treated like this and it reminds me why I fell in love with you in the first place. Which is part of the reason why I can’t give you another chance. Everything’s so familiar and I can’t go through another heartbreak.” I open my mouth to defend myself but she puts up her hand to stop me, “I know that you’ve changed this week, that you’ve changed for me. But you still have at least two addresses, you don’t let women see you at work, and it’s practically impossible to track you down to a single place. It’s obvious that you really haven’t changed your ways.”

I wait for her to say more but when she doesn’t I start to speak, “I can’t deny that I hadn’t really changed my ways before this week, but a big part of that is because I believed I’d never see you again. You blame me for all of your terrible relationships and I understand that. At the same time though once I realized that you were the only one for me and that I’d never be able to get you back I just let go and did what I do best. I’ve been running on auto-pilot for sixteen years.”

“James, you’ll find someone. And trust me, she’ll be much better than me. You don’t want to deal with someone so broken, James. You really don’t. I’m not the person you think you fell in love with.” I inhale sharply as I hear those words leave her mouth. How could she think so poorly of herself?

Something clicked about her reasoning for not dating. Not that that really mattered anymore, but it was something I definitely needed to know the answer to. “Why aren’t you a lawyer in New York?”

“Nice subtle change of subject Watson.”

“I’m serious Selena. Right next to having your own family, you’d always dreamed about becoming a lawyer in New York. You even had a house picked out. And earlier today you said that you took the test there just in case you ever bought that house. So why did you never move to New York, buy the house, and start to at least live half your dream?”

She moves her eyes to her lap, “I-After your mothers funeral I realized you lived in New York. I didn’t know that before but, well, it became obvious after talking to people. I couldn’t chance running into you. So I took the test for the state just as a safety. But I never plan to use it.”

I sit back in my seat, staring at her. “You’re right, you are broken.”

“What?!”

“You’re not the girl I know at all. The girl I know would do anything to achieve her dreams. She definitely wouldn’t let the chance of running into me stop her from it. And she never needed ‘safety’ plans because there wasn’t a chance of things failing. She wouldn’t let it.”

Selena crosses her arms, “you’re wrong. You don’t know as much about me as you think James.”

I cock an eyebrow, “oh? And what am I getting incorrect?”

“you.”

“what about me?”

She sighs, dropping her eyes once again. I hated when she did that. “you’re right, I have always wanted to have a family and own that white picket fence and everything. And yes, I’d love to work at a firm in New York City. But ever since that kiss at the fair, my number one dream was you.”

I was speechless. Totally and utterly speechless. I have had many girls say that they need me and want me and everything in between. But never once did the thought cross my mind that I’d be someone’s dream.

“I know it’s stupid. I just kind of got caught up in that whole fairytale love story. And then I actually had you and for those few months everything seemed perfect through my eyes. Obviously I was oblivious to something because you…did what you did. We broke up and I never talked to you until now. I-”

“It’s not stupid.” I finally say, interrupting her.

“It’s not?”

“no. In a way, it’s pretty much the same that I thought.” Selena looks at me confused. “We were so close back then and everyone expected us to end up together. You and I always forgave each other after a fight, no matter how big. I think that’s one of the main reasons I did what I did…besides the whole trust thing. I just assumed that we’d go back to the way it was before. You were always there for me and I never thought you’d leave me. It was like I could do whatever I wanted with others and still have you. At the time, it seemed like the perfect life. But then I pushed the limits a little too far.”

She chuckles, “a little?”

“okay, a lot. And I truly am sorry for that.”

“I know James.”

“I’ll apologize a million times to get you to forgive me.”

Selena laughs, “well, as much as I’d love to see that, I’ve already forgiven you.”

“you have? When?”

“On the plane, when you apologized. That’s all I needed you know. I needed to hear you say ‘sorry’ but it never came out of your mouth that day.” She explains, “and then the story about your mom…that helped a lot with the whole forgiving process. I understand now why you did what you did, but that doesn’t mean I’m not mad at you. You should have known you’d be able to trust me.”

“I know. I was stupid.”

Silence fell upon us, but it was a nice silence. It felt familiar and relaxing. The music playing in the background seemed to become louder as the two of us just picked at our desserts. The song on my ipod changed to a more slow dance song, one that I knew by heart. “Want to dance?” I ask, holding out my hand.

She smiles and nods, slipping her hand into mine. We stand up and move to the side of the table. As we sway back and forth I start to whisper the words to the song into her ear. Close to the end Selena stops and pulls back a little, looking up at me. “James?”

“yeah?”

“I know we don’t have a lot of time left. But in the time we do have, do you think we could…” She trails off but I easily knew what she meant.

“I was hoping you’d ask.” I smile at her, watching carefully as she pulls me closer, our lips millimeters apart.

“that’s good, cause you didn’t really have a choice.” And with that last sentence from her, I shut her up for the rest of the night.

Okay, I didn't want to have to do this, but I would like at least two (2) comments before I upload next. I don't know what's gotten into everyone or maybe all my readers haven't been reading. But to go two chapters with one (slightly forced) comment?? That's crazy.
Plus, this chapter definitely deserves some comments. I got them together, didn't I?
Anyways, please comment and vote...if you're not liking it tell me why, if you are well, COMMENT!

<3 justrealizelife

p.s.  I wish James was real...or Greg. I'd take either :)

p.p.s. If you read Blue Sky... Please check out my new short story To Become Another. It's part of that series.