The Fine Line

Chapter 16

Diya's POV

I sit on the dark corner with knees to my chest, my clothes damp and body numb. I dont know why but I've lost my energy for motion. I've lost the will to move. I've turned blue in the last few hours. Its been how many hours since Zarah's breakdown, I do not know. Its been eerily quiet on her part. No words, no movement. She lay still on her bed.

Sitting here, I'm wondering on the normal stuff rather than the complication in the past few days. Like, when was the last time she attended class. When was the last time she took a minute to do something other than drugs. When was the last time she touched her treasured books or at least glanced at them. When was the last time she talked to her friends. Well, I wouldnt worry much about her friends as they're all complete bitches. But when was the last time she opened upto a real friend?. Does she even have a real friend?
I've noticed someone named Jess calling her a hundred times a day and countless messages from him. But she hasnt touched her phone since the day I arrived. I never got the chance to talk about him. I made a mental note to ask her on this mysterious Jess.

I needed her to be normal. She needed a normal life just like other girls. She needs to go out with her friends. She needs to sneak out at night. She needs to do all those crazy stuff you do in your 20s. She needs to make mistakes. She needs to fall down. She needs to learn and rise against them. She needs someone to lend a hand when she falls. She needs someone to promise her  'everything's going to be okay' when things seems wrong. She deserves all those normal stuff. She needs a normal life.

In determination of all these things I want for her, I promised myself that I would give anything to grant her that. It was time.

Theres something too pleasant about this corner. I've always found Saira in this spot. Everybody had a comfort spot where they felt like themselves. Like that spot took them to another dimension where anything can exist. I never knew what Saira found here. But I feel it now. There is something too breezy and calm about this place. Maybe its the bay window giving this spot its magic. Whatever it maybe , its like I can feel her again. Saira. The old cheery, sweet girl I've always known her to be. The old Saira whose filled with the cold  breeze of summer, the magic of the rain, the joy of the snowflakes, the cheerfulness of the spring, and the cleansing aura of autumn. This is the way I want to remember her. This is the way I want Zarah to remember her. All these positivity gives me a kickstart and in the next second, I'm on my feet.

I walk over to Zarah, who is as of now lying on the bed, knees to her chest under her blanket. Like she's hiding from something. Her eyes fixated on the walls across the room.
I lie opposite  her and now she stares right into my eyes and for a split second I see fear in them. I see the ghost of her past threatening to kick her down. I know that she's struggling hard. I smile contently to ease her. But to my surprise she apologises.

"Huh?" I question her full of concern and doubt.

"Diya, I admit that you took me by surprise when you came back. Suddenly all those suppressed things came back right at me. I didn't know how to react. I'm so sorry for treating you the way I did. I was a jerk, I'm really sorry. I really am." Her voice so vulnerable. I've never seen her like this. I mean, shes been always this brave girl, never afraid to explore, never afraid to keep going no matter what. Well, she never failed o apologise for her mistakes. She is a kind girl but she never apologised with vulnerability in her eyes. She used to apologise with kindness and warmth in her voice.

I say nothing. Instead I kiss on her forehead and a satisfying smile escaping her lips. Score. I was winning. I had to. Theres no going back if I lose. That smile was my trophy. I would cherish it forever.

" Lets get you cleaned up. Dry off and get dresses, you look like shit!" I try my best to cheer her up. She smiles again and goes off.

When she came back, I almost gasp at her appearance. Theres something new in her. Something so innocent and bright. Like her old self hovering over her, ready to slip into her with peace.
She wears a plain yellow dress which ends just below her knees. Her blond hair let down, lays like the waves of ocean on her shoulders, with much grace. Her captivating blue eyes look at me with so much intensity in them as they are in search for something. Like they crave protection. Her beautiful eyes gaze into me deeper as I stand speechless.

It was then that I recalled the events unfolded before she collapsed. The words that troubled me. Those words which were filling me up with anxiety and curiosity. She notices my face growing restless. I gesture her to come sit down beside me. I sit on the edge of the bed, legs dangling where as she sits legs crossed like an innocent child waiting for a bedtime story.

"How're you feeling?" I ask her to find out if she'll be okay to digest the unravelling words that I'm about to reveal to her. Well, I seriously doubt it.

She thinks for a moment before she answers . "New and and a little less weighed, I guess." She says truthfully.

"Thats better."

"Diya, what is it? You sound disturbed."

"Z, I found something a while ago. I need you to be calm. Okay? I know you've just started to feel comfortable with all these shit thats been happening but you've got to know this."

"You're scaring me, Diya. Spill it out." I hear a tint of anger.
Uh oh, that isn't good.

God, here goes nothing.

I go over to the side table and pick the shards of mirror . I lay them on the bed in front of Zarah.
I see her eyes widen with disbelief as they glance from piece to piece. My heartbeat pace as I see her breathing shallow. Tears threaten to come out, her hands shaking.

"WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?" yelling, her eyes gives me death glare as to grill the truth from me. "This isn't the time for you stupid pranks, Diya!"
Anger building up in her, she looks frantically at me for an answer.

"In case you didnt notice, Z, I'm a grown woman. I'm 24 for God's sake !. Do you think I'd play pranks on such a matter?"

She stays silent. She doesn't give me an answer. Instead she returns to make sense of the words that lay for her on the mirror pieces. Stunned at the revelations revealed before her eyes she looks at me one more time. Alarmingly, she lunges at the broken mirror across the room and with a swift push she takes it down. Placing it over the rug. Before flipping it over, she inhales deeply. Like a puzzle she used to play in her childhood, Zarah connects the shards to the whole mirror.