Chresanto August.
I could say that name all day. His perfect white teeth, his perfect brown skin, his chocolate brown eyes, even his voice made me love him more and more everyday. He was just so perfect. Every girl wanted him, and that's why I knew I couldn't have him. Why?
1.) I don't have big boobs
2.) I don't have a big ass
3.) I'm not mixed
4.) I don't have a perfect white smile
5.) I'm not tall
6.) I'm not girly
7.) I don't have what you would call "swag"
8.) I'm not rich
And the list goes on. The girls at my school are just about all of that. Which is exactly what Chresanto likes. But I'm basically none of those.
Where I live every girl is expected have a nice body, to be rich and beautiful. I've always wanted to be like those girls that just post pictures on the internet and they're instantly famous. Like India Westbrooks or Kayla Devechelle.
They're both so perfect. Rich, beautiful, and everyone loves them. Any guy would kill to have them and any girl would kill to be them. I'm not afraid to admit that I'm very jealous of both of them.
I've never really been the one to have low confidence, just being around all those pretty girls made me realize how un-attractive I was. Seeing all those models with perfect shapes, smiles, and a perfect life just got to me.
I have only four friends at school, and though they tease me all the time, they are my only hope to not being even more alone than I already am. My "friends" are all pretty, rich and more. While I'm just me. No I'm not poor, but I'm no where near rich.
Even though all the girls at my school are what you would call "thots" it wouldn't hurt to at least look like them. I try not to stress over them but it's hard when you see them just about everyday.
I never really tell anyone how I feel because I doubt they will understand. When I lived in New Orleans I had a lot of friends and people to talk, but they've all forgotten about me now so there's no use trying to go back.
I'm really just an average girl, but here that's just not enough. Average is like being nothing. At least five times a week I just stare at the sky and pray that one day my wish really will come true.
-November 24, 2013, Alexandria Celine
I wrote those last words in cursive as I closed my journal. Since I have no real friends, my journal holds all of my secrets. I sat in my desk chair and stared at the wall for a few minutes.
I finally snapped back into reality. I grabbed my journal and placed it under my bed. I walked downstairs to see if my mother was home. I then realized that she told me she had to work today.
I was used to my mom not being home. Though I wish she could be here I knew she had to work. I knew she was just doing it for me and we needed the money, so I didn't even try to put more pressure on her by being mad.
I walked back up to my bedroom and into my bathroom. I ran the hot water in the tub. I slowly removed my clothes looking away from the mirror. Slowly I stepped in the hot water.
I don't know what happened to me. I tried not to let those girls and my "friends" get to me, but some how they had their own way of sneaking into my feelings.
When I was done washing up, I grabbed my towel and wrapped it around me. I walked into my bedroom and grabbed my phone. I turned on my Pandora and "Feenin' " by Jodeci came on.
This was one of my favorite songs. I'm more of an old school music type of music, but I have my 2 Chainz moments. I put on my black and white striped cardigan, jeans, and boots. I brushed my hair out, leaving it straight down.
I felt my stomach growl a while ago so I decided to go get myself something to eat. So I grabbed my car keys and drove to McDonalds. I ordered what I usually did, McDouble w/ McSauce and a Fry.
When I got back home I walked up to my bedroom, turned on my TV and began to eat.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I woke to the noise of someone ringing my doorbell. I got up and ran downstairs. When I opened the door you wouldn't even believe who was there, my "friends". Their names were Vanessa, Valentina, Venice, and Victoria.
They called themselves "The Fab Four". Which was a very unoriginal name. "Alexandria Celine Wilson!" Valentina said smiling. "There you are! Girl we have been looking around everywhere for you!" she said still smiling.
"Well I've been here the whole time, I mean where else would I be?" I said putting on my best fake smile. "Oh yeah we forgot, you have no life!" Vanessa said as they all burst out into laughter.
"Anyways, are you going to let us in or are we just going to stand out here?" Venice asked rudely. "Sure, come in." I said moving out the way. They all walked in, heels clicking against the ground.
They walked into the living room and sat down while I just stood there. Victoria patted the seat next to her gesturing me to sit down. I slowly sat down as they all started look at each other.
Once they all nodded their heads Vanessa looked back at me with a smile. "So you know that we are The Fab Four." She said swallowing. "And this is going to be hard but-"
"Oh forget it! Listen Alexandria! We don't like you! We never did and we never will! We are cutting you from being a bystander of the group! That means you can't hang out with us! Talk to us! Hell, don't even look at us!" Valentina yelled cutting Vanessa off.
"Well that just about sums it up." Venice said with a "whatever" look. "No! Please you guys are all I have!" I said. These girls really thought I cared. "It doesn't matter know. Girls." Victoria said as they all got up and walked out.
When they left I got up form the couch and walked back up to my room. I realized that it was slightly messy in there, so I decided to clean up. I grabbed my phone and turned on one of my favorite songs, "Numb" by Rihanna and Eminem.
I walked around my room singing the song while picking clothes up and straightening things up when I heard a noise downstairs. I slowly walked down the stairs peeking my head around the corner to see who it was.
It was Vanessa. I guess she left something? I made sure that she didn't get anything that wasn't hers. I know how they are and they love to steal. But why would they steal from me?
When she left I ran downstairs and made sure I locked the door. I walked back into my room and changed into my pajamas. I layed back down on my bed and slowly fell asleep.
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How was it?! Please give me feedback whether it's good or bad. Oh and if it sucks i'm sorry, what had happened was i typed it and it was really really really good. But then when i pressed backspace it went back to the home page. I was just about to save but then i was like no let me type this last part which is the part im typing now and i didn't save ANY of it. So i had to retype it but the reason why it's not as good i because i was so mad that i couldn't remember what i typed first. So please give me feedback. Vote, comment, add to you reading list and have a great day beautiful!! P.S: This story is basically made to show the beauty of all girls. if you don't understand that now then you will by the end of the story.
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FanfictionAlexandria Celine, a 16 year old girl, has never been the girl that everyone stopped and stared at, at least not in the way she wanted. All her life shes hoped, dreamed, even prayed that one day she could be like those others girls, just for one boy...