An Angel Named Kiran.

Chapter Five

Sitting on the bathroom floor, with my back against the tub, I couldn't stop shaking. What was I thinking? Why on earth did I do that? I can't believe myself. I committed an act of insanity. Granted, it was a good and perfect insanity, but it was insanity all the same. 

Kissing Kiran? I can't believe I did that. I've known that they guy existed, since what? Last night. How unbelievably stupid am I? Obviously very. I know that it feels like I've known him my whole life, and technically I have, but that's no excuse. No excuse at all. He's an angel. I'm, well, I'm a teenage girl who can barely utter a word. Who has only uttered one partial sentence in the last two months. I am the girl, who shut down after my dad died. He died, and I didn't cry. I just sat there, staring blankly at anything or anyone who tried to get my attention. That lasted for almost two weeks. Until the night that Cam came into my bedroom, picked me up, and sat me down in the shower. I had all of my clothes on, and I just stared right through him. But then, he turned on the steaming hot water. And he wouldn't stop screaming at me. He said the same thing, over and over,

"Micah! Wake up! Snap out of it and wake up! You're not the only one who lost him! I did too! He was my dad too, and now he's gone! I can't lose you too!!" Cam had burst into tears, just as I did. He sank down to the bathroom floor, and I leaned out of the shower, and put my arms around him; neither of us caring that I was soaking wet with boiling hot water. The heat felt good, it had gotten rid of the chill that had been in our bones since the day that we were told about our dad. 

Knock Knock. 

"Micah, please, let me in." Kiran was on the other side of the door. There was no way that I was unlocking it. I wouldn't. I couldn't handle facing him. I was so ashamed. I had kissed him, he was a stranger. Though, it really felt like I'd known him forever. I couldn't shake that feeling. Ever since he'd appeared to me in my bedroom, he'd made me feel so much more like me than I had in a long time. Walking around in an empty shell, hardly there, it isn't me. I used to be such a happy person. I used to have the makings of greatness in me, as my dad would say, and he'd always try to catch the light that was coming off of me. I guess, when he died, I lost that light- that greatness. Now Kiran's here, and he's helping me get it back. I'm catching the light that's coming from his greatness.

"Micah. Don't make me apperate in there." He said, his voice going softer on the word, apperate. I could only imagine how foolish he thought me. But I could swear that I know him. We've, we've been together before. At some point, and I just don't understand it. He's, my guardian angel, so obviously I've known him my whole life, but it's more than that. It's a different feeling. It's like reading in a love story, how the author explains the one person's soul saying, 'oh hello, I've been missing you.' to the other person's soul. That's what it felt like when Kiran showed up in my bedroom.

"Three. Two. On-" I opened the door, right as Kiran apperated right into the room. He was behind me now, and I was glad that he couldn't see my face. I was sure that it was bright red. I was so embarrassed. 

Kiran, I can't do this right now. I thought to him, keeping my mind sealed off. There was no way that I was going to be letting him see what my feelings were at the moment. Hell, maybe I didn't even know what they were. There was just too many of them, bouncing around in my hectic mind. 

Micah, He thought to me hesitantly, it's okay. You don't need to be upset. It's quite all right. He thought this to me, but I couldn't believe it. I couldn't believe it at all. 

It's okay? No Kiran, it's not 'okay'. It's not even remotely okay. I don't even know you. I mean, sure, you're my guardian angel and all, but me, myself, and I? We don't know you. You know us, but we don't know you. I just kissed a stranger. I had a stranger hold me while I slept, and made me breakfast. You were in the house while I was showering, while no one was home. That's not 'okay' at all. Not at all. You're a stranger, but I'm acting like I've known your for centuries. That is what it feels like to me, that I've known you for centuries, but that doesn't change the fact that you're a stranger. I can't be doing things like kissing you. My dad wouldn't even want me alone in the house with you! I'm seventeen years old, I should not be sleeping in the same bed with you. I should not be kissing you, a stranger, who showed up in my room in the middle of the night. I just shouldn't be doing any of those things! I ranted on and on, and even though I was only thinking those things- I was out of breath by the time that I was done.

Kiran:

If only she knew the truth. If only she knew. If only I could tell her. That would make it so much easier. So much easier. 

"Micah, we'll take it slow. I won't sleep in your bed anymore, and I can go back to just being your guardian, who only shows up when you need me. I don't need to be here. I can just go back to how it was, but it's up to you." I told her, my heat aching. I couldn't go back to how things were. It would hurt too much. I've just now gotten her to know that I'm here. She kissed me.

No. No, I don't want that. We just, we can't do that again. Not until I know you better. I can't move to fast with you. I can't screw this up. Not again. She thought to me, and when she looked at me, I could see the pain in her eyes. Though, I'm not sure what she meant by, 'Not again." because she doesn't know anything about our past.

Micah:

As I told Kiran that I didn't want to screw up again, my thoughts were on the dream that I had. The one where we were in a garden full of brightly colored fruits, and luscious green plants. The dream where, we were lovers. Where, he kept his wings of light, but mine disappeared. I don't know what made me think of that dream, but whatever it was, it must have been important. 

Thunk. 

"Your mom and Cam are back," Kiran whispered to me and I nodded, "Now that they're home, I'm going to go over to my place in the other realm for a little bit. Be safe, I'll be back soon." And then he vanished right before my eyes. 

"Hey Micah, we're home!" Cam yelled from the living room, just as I started to walk in. He grinned. "So, the college in Olympia? It was fantastic. Such a great Marine Biology program. You know, if you change your mind on going to college in Idaho, this one's got a great creative writing program." He said, right before taking a bite out of his apple.

"Maybe." I murmured. Cam about choked on his apple, and my mom dropped her glass of milk in shock. The whole thing shattered on the floor, and I couldn't help but laugh. And I kept laughing. Cam and my mom were giving me reproaching looks, and soon my laughing turned to tears. Cam was the first one to come over to me, and he wrapped his arms around me, and lowered me to the floor, where we sat. I couldn't stop crying, as my voice hoarsely said, "I miss him. I miss him so much." over and over. 

"I know baby, I know." My mom said to me, stroking my hair, as Cam rubbed my back and said,

"We all do Micah, we all do." I don't know how long we sat there like that; on the floor with me on Cam's lap, as his and my mother's arms were wrapped tightly around me as we all cried. However long it was, I was glad that we did. I think we all needed it, and I know that even though my dad couldn't be with us; with my mom and Cam there with me, it was almost like he was too.