Sinking Blue

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Running

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Running.

That's all I did for the past 12 hours.

How do I feel?

Free, but I know that it's only because I'm trying to ignore the inevitable.

I killed Malia.

I killed her.

After Theo's lie, I thought that Scott and I's friendship would be over, but this is endgame.

I killed someone, not because I was trying to protect myself or someone else, but because I was angry.

I was angry, and I convinced myself that I could curve around by saying that it was to "protect Lydia".

How could I do this?

How could I let it get this far?

How could I--

"Ow!" I clutched my scrapped knee, only to be met by torn fabric.

I scoffed down at the already healed wound.

Just 12 hours ago I felt like a true werewolf. I felt powerful in accepting who I am, and who I am going to be for the rest of my life.

But now everything feels wrong.

I looked up at the sky as the thunder roared.

I have to go back.

I turned back in the direction that I had come from, only to be stopped by approaching footsteps.

I let my senses roam as I searched for the scent.

Chi.

I slammed him into a tree just as he came into the clearing.

"You did this didn't you?! You knew that Malia and I were in a bad place, you set this whole thing up!" I stepped back as I let go of him.

The anger was building up again, but I knew that I had to control it. I panted as I tried to slow my heart down.

The rain that began pouring only made it worse.

Happy thoughts.

My dad, Scott, my friends, my mom, and Malia, and--

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