Journal of an A-Level Student

3rd September 2016 - Entry 1

Hey. So this is my journal from now on, I guess. I'm not gonna do that sad teenage girl thing where I write in here every day about my crush and how I hate my teachers and my parents and some bitch that I don't like. I'm gonna write things in here like my favourite colour, my favourite season, my favourite book, my favourite movie. Just things that make me happy, I guess.

And normally I'd say something really emo-ish right now, because that's sorta who I am, like "not many things do make me happy so this will be short" but to be honest, that's not true. I think for a long time I've tried to be someone I'm not to impress my friends who, to be frank, saw through my shit long before I realized they didn't give a shit who I was pretending to be. They loved me for me.

A lot of things actually make me happy. Seeing babies sleeping. Smelling books that have sat on my bookshelf for a long time. Watching old Disney films. Eating popcorn. Getting caught in the rain. Sitting in a cafe drinking chilled Pepsi and reading a book. Sleeping with my cat. Going shopping and coming home with bags full of awesome stuff. Finding new stuff to read. Seeing interesting photos.

I know these sound like "classic hipster" things to say, but they genuinely do warm my heart. These things and much more are pretty much my raisons d'être.

So all this aside, I hope you enjoy reading my diary. And I kinda hope I enjoy writing it. I doubt I'll write super-long passages about how my days have been, or write sad love songs about how someone's pork pies are better than everyone else's and I just need them in my life (first of all, I'm a vegetarian.) I'll write stuff in here that I actually will need at some point in my life.

This book isn't to make you think I'm somebody that I'm not. It's not to manipulate my public image or get popular by having "the coolest diary". I doubt many people will even read it. This book is for me. To help me.

One day, I'll be scrolling through everything I ever wrote and I'll stumble upon this and I will actually be in shock. I'll be so surprised that I wrote something that actually means something to me. Sure, I've written plenty of poems that mean something to me now. Maybe about a lost love or being misunderstood. But when I look back at those poems twenty, thirty years from now, I won't give a shit about them.

When I read my diary in the future, I know it will bring tears to my eyes reading about my friends, my family, how life used to be. How I never gave up. How I always took a stand for the things I believed in. And even if my life has gone to shit, and I'm living on the streets with a pet donkey called Ralph, I know that somewhere, deep down, I'll be happy when I read my diary. It'll make me feel something.

Enjoy.