I woke up to the sweet sound of Dylan's voice. I open my eyes and there he is sitting in the red chair by my bed talking to my mom and dad. They didn’t notice I was awake. They started talking about my condition. My mom said that I was getting worse each day and she didn’t know if I could make it much longer. I lay quietly listening to their conversation. Dylan grows quite and next thing you know he starts to cry. My mom comforts him and says everything is going to be alright but I know she thinks im close to dying also. What they don’t know is how determined I am to fight this cancer. Nobody really knows how strong I actually am. I rustle around in my bed to make them aware that I am awake now. My mom walks over to me and asks me how im doing. I told her I was fine. The nurses come in and check on me every half an hour or so to see how im progressing. Dylan says he has to go and then he left the room. He sounded upset. I guess any guy would be upset if there girlfriend had leukemia. My mom and dad leave the room so I can have a little alone time to think stuff over and to process everything. I still can’t comprehend why it had to be me to get leukemia. I know feeling sorry for myself wont help anything but why me that is the question I have been asking since I have found out the news.
A week has past by now and im still feeling weak and helpless. I hear my phone vibrate. I look at the table and grab it. Its a text message from Dylan. It says...
“Sophia im coming to the hospital in about twenty minutes. I have something really important to tell you. It might be hard for you to understand but it will be ok.”
I think to myself what would he tell me that could be so hard to understand? Maybe he’s not aloud to come see me anymore because im sick. Or maybe he's getting his phone taken away so I can’t text him anymore. Or maybe somethings wrong with him or his family. I keep wondering and my thoughts just get worse. I can’t think about the “what ifs” anymore it will kill me. Literary. I look and there is my cute Dylan standing in the doorway. He pulls a chair up next to my bed and starts to explain himself.
“Sophia I know this is going to be hard for you but its for the best.”
“Just tell me whats going on Dylan”
“I am breaking up with you.”
“What.”
“I am breaking up with you.” he says again quietly
“You can’t break up with me your the one thing that drives me the most to fight this cancer to get better!” I start to get teary eyed.
“Sophia don’t you go and give me the gilt trip! Just because you have cancer doesn’t mean you can do this to me.”
“Do what to you? I haven’t done anything except care for you!”
“Just stop talking Sophia! Im done here.”
“This is just like you!”
“What do you mean this is just like me?”
“I mean its just like you when I need you the most you bale on me!”
My parents walk in when we are in the middle of our fight they forced him to leave. After he left they asked me what happened. I was to upset to talk about it. In my free time I wrote a list of what I had to live for and this is what it looks like...
What I have to live for...
1. My family
2. My friends
Yes only two things on the whole list. Now I am thinking should I even try anymore do I need to live? Most of the time when I ask myself this I say no. Dylan was the best thing that ever happened to me and now he's gone. I don’t know why he left. The thing that kills me the most is he said he would always be there for me and he would always love me. Well now I know all he is, is a coward.
![I Use To Believe In Love [On Hold]](https://img.wattpad.com/cover/857588-64-k442936.jpg)