I Use To Believe In Love [On Hold]

Chapter 5

Caden continued to visit Jane and myself everyday. I look forward to his visits! I think Caden is helping me get over Dylan. Dylan and I had a lot in common but me and Caden have more in common. 

Today he walked in and a little girl trailed behind him. He introduced her. It was his little sister Lily she was seven years old. She was the cutest little thing she had blonde hair and she had Caden’s amazing blue eyes. She ran in the hospital room and jumped on Jane’s bed. After she hugged Jane she got off the bed and turned her attention to me. She looked fascinated but scared at the same time. Caden asked me if I minded if she talked to me. I told him I loved kids and would love to talk to her. She walked over to me and got on my bed.

“Im Lily whats your name?” She asked.

“I am Sophia its nice to meet you.”

“Wait a second your Sophia? The one that Caden talks about all the time? He says great stuff about you like...”

Caden interrupts her. “Ok Lily you don’t need to tell her anymore.”

I laugh at his embarrassed red face.

“So how old are you im seven!” Lily proceeds excitedly.

“I am fifteen im turning sixteen in a week and two days.”

She turns and looks at Caden. “Brother can we come back here on her birthday?”

“Sure we can Lily.” Caden replies

“So where are your parents?” Caden questions.

“There at home with my little sister”

“Oh they don’t stay with you”

“Well the doctors said im getting a little better so this morning they went home to make sure my sister was alright. My grandma is watching her while my parents are here with me.”

“I am really glad that your getting better!” 

The feeling of guilt then kicked in. I realize that I just lied to Caden. I told him the doctors said I was getting better the reality was I was getting worse. How could he believe me I looked worse than ever! All im trying to do is protect him from the truth. My parents were actually at home calling all the relatives to tell them I was getting worse. I know he is going to find out somehow but now is just not the right time. 

The next day Caden is here again but today he is acting weird around me. Maybe he found out I was lying? He sat on the edge of my bed and looked in my blue eyes and I looked into his. In that moment if felt like we were connected somehow. He scooted closer and started talking. 

“Sophia I know you are sick and you might never get better but I just want you to know that I will always be here for you! We might get into fights but I will still always be here. I want you to know that I love you so much I can’t even explain it! No we haven’t known each other for very long but it seems like I have known you for a lifetime and I wanted to know..... If you would go out with me?”

I was speechless I didn’t know what to do because I think I love him back but if I don’t have much longer to live I don’t know if I should. If I did go out with him and I died what would he feel like when I was gone. Terrible! I can’t do that to him I love him to much to make him suffer!

I think long and hard about my decision and then I start to open my mouth...