I Use To Believe In Love [On Hold]

Chapter 2

I haven’t been the same the past few days. I feel like im getting weaker everyday. Dylan comes over but not as often since I may be getting sick. The thing that scares me the most is I don't know what is wrong with me. I have been having a hard time breathing, I have pain in my bones, im tired all the time, and I am as pale as a ghost. Im trying to keep telling myself nothing is wrong with me. I can’t be sick I have to much to do with the family and with school. Not seeing Dylan as much is the thing killing me the most! I still text him all the time but its just not the same. A couple days pass and my condition grows worse. I can’t get up and move around. And if im not covered by millions of blankets my body shakes uncontrollably. 

I woke up in a hospital bed. Im very confused and cold. I hear doctors and nurses saying I am in critical condition. I think to myself am I dying is this how I am going to die? I didn’t even say goodbye to Dylan yet. I see my mother hovering over me. I try to ask her what was going on but I can’t speak. I lift my hand and touch my lips they were ice cold. I move my hand up to my nose and there I felt a breathing tube. My mother starts singing to me like old times. She sang to me when I was little to get me to calm down. It always helps but im still very scared. They moved my bed to another room. I feel safer in this room its more homey. I look to my left and there is a blue wall with white strips. I look to my right and there is a little old lady. I guess she is my roommate. A nurse walks over to me and tells my mom that we are going to try removing the breathing tube and see if I can breath on my own. She slowly takes out the breathing tube. I try to breathe but I can’t. I frantically gasp for air, frightened she puts the breathing tube back in. You could tell she was a new nurse. I try to talk again. I asked my mom what happened. She calmly explained. 

“Im glad you can talk a little honey. Well I came home from work and you were on the couch unconscious. I called your father and quickly got you in the car. I drove you here and they told me some news and now we are here taking baby steps to recovery.”

“Well mom... Whats wrong with me?”

“Honey we can talk about that later, right now you just need to calm down and rest.”

“Mom I want to know just please tell me.”

“Honey you heard what I said now lay back and rest I will be right back im going to go get you father.”

So im laying here even more panicked because she wont tell me whats wrong with me! It must be something really bad if she wont even tell me. I look at the old lady again. She is looking back at me. 

“Hi.” I said to the wrinkled lady.

“Well hello, im Jane.”

“Nice to meet you Jane, im Sophia. Did you by chance here what was wrong with me?”

“I love that name. And I didn’t I am very sorry though I know how it feels to be confused.”

“Umm... Why are you here?”

“I was walking down the steps and slipped and now I have a broken arm, hip, back, and my leg”

“Oh im really sorry.”

“I am too.”

My mom came back in the room with my dad. He kissed my forehead like he usually does. My mom asked me if im ready for the news. I was scared to hear it but I knew I would at least feel a little better that I knew what was wrong. She starts talking and when she starts one of her lectures they don’t end. She rambles on about how its going to be ok and we will get through it and how she know its going to be hard for me but to stay strong. I was getting more tired by the minute all I wanted to know was what was wrong and if I was going to be ok. She finally confesses that I have leukemia. My heart sinks. I start to cry but then I think to myself crying will do nothing I can’t cry I have to fight this cancer if I want to have a chance at living again. I was a strong girl but now I have to be ten times stronger. My mind wanders back to Dylan. I ask my mom to call him. She left the room to go call him. A couple minutes later she came back and said he was on his way. I get a rush of excitement. Im so happy that I can finally see him again. I wait and wait until I see him walk through my room doors. He walks over and hugs me. He doesn’t look as happy to see me as I was to see him. I asked him why and he just said because he never wanted to see me in this condition. I just reassured him and told him that I was going to fight and get better. He kissed me and got in the hospital bed with me. He laid there cuddling me until it was dark. The doctors made him leave. They said I needed my rest. He left and I laid in that hospital bed all night thinking I will not let this cancer defeat me I will win!