(Eddsworld) Saloonatics - The Kidnapping

1 - Evil Afoot

(Just in case people are still confused:
Edd: Edward
Matt: Prince Matthew
Tom: Sheriff Thomson
Tord: Todd
Eduardo: Eduardo
Mark: Marco
Jon: Juan)

It was 18-- and the town of Spitbucket, USA was still infested with bandits. Even after Edward Gold and the sheriff rescued the prince, something still wasn't right. A trip to England was too expensive, so the sheriff would have to wait. The town hadn't been running good, and Sheriff Thomson was well on his way of retiring. Or just giving up on the town completely.

Now, Thomson spent his days in the bar, drinking his sorrows away. Of course Edward had to be the one to walk in when he was at his most...inebriated moments.

"Uhum, sheriff?" Edward tapped him on the shoulder. "There's something wrong with the bank. People say that money keeps disappearing–"

"Gold, I really don't have time for this." Thomson told him with a slur. "The bandits are gonna attack EVERYWHERE. Some things just can't be fixed. Includin' me..." The sheriff tipped his hat down, not wanting him to see his self-pitiful expression.

"Hey, what are you talking about?" Edward said with a worried look. "You're amazing! You helped me with the bandits in a pinch! Why are you so hard on yourself all of a sudden?"

"Because YOU did all the amazing stuff. I'm just the boring old sheriff who's got a drinking problem."

Todd, the bartender, looked over at the sheriff, then looked back at the mugs he was cleaning. He seemed more...shady than usual.

Thomson sighed. "I'm sorry. I just need to get my act together."

Edward just smiled big at him. "That's totally fine! I don't blame you." He told him.

Prince Matthew strutted in at the time, just about exhausted from the heat.

He sat down next to the sheriff, fanning himself. "Pardon me, but do you happen to have water?" The prince asked the bartender with a wipe to his face.

"Lemme go get it." Todd shrugged, walking slowly to the back. "And can you get me a refill?" Thomson asked. "You got it." Todd then grabbed the sheriff's empty flask, then began to walk back to the casks. He then talked to a walkie-talkie quietly. "Aaaaaaand..." He looked at the rest, who didn't pay attention. "Cue Eduardo."

Eduardo came in, and the bartender didn't come out until business was done. Matthew looked at who entered, and fell out of his stool with fright, yelling out: "Hey! That's the bandit who kidnapped me!!"

"You're right." Eduardo smirked at him, sitting next to Thomson.

The terrified prince clung to Edward as he saw Eduardo's looks and glares at him. Thomson rolled his eye and looked over the table. Prince Matthew shook and shivered with fear, fretful of if Eduardo harmed him. Or his face. He couldn't bare the thought of it.

Edward sighed and carried Prince Matthew out, thinking that he would be safer outside. He took Matthew into the bank. Hopefully it wasn't too roomy and hot for him, because he was hyperventilating. Poor smol bean.

Thomson stayed, rolling his eye again. Eduardo was here for business. He didn't want the prince. He didn't want Edward. He simply wanted something else. A signal, perhaps.

Thomson was alone. And completely helpless.

Todd gave the sheriff back his flask, smiling sneakily under his bushy mustache. Uh oh.

Thomson gulped his flask down. Bad idea. Once he finished his Smirnoff(?), he began to grow lightheaded.

The side's of his eye began to grow dark along with his sight. His breathing started to get faster and his body was numb. A few seconds later, he passed out. This sequence is based off of real experiences of passing out in the heat. So if this isn't that accurate to drinking something other than Smirnoff, I apologize.

Eduardo smirked as he realize his cue was up. Marco and Juan got into the room. Marco looked very evil while Juan held a balloon in his hands, looking like a baby at a party.

Eduardo groaned and got them over here. He did most of the work putting Thomson on the cot. There seemed something strange going on.

Juan went over to Marco with a rag. "Hey do you think this smells like chloroform to you?" He asked as he put it in his face. "No lo sé-" Then Marco passed out. Welp. That was chloroform alright.

Eduardo rolled his eyes at the stupidity of his teammates, carrying Thomson by himself. Since he couldn't set up the cot and was very angry with it.

Juan went over and helped him immediately, putting his cloth in Thomson's face. "Y'know..." Eduardo began. "Sometimes you aren't as big of a bonehead as I thought you'd be." He told Juan. "Wow....." spoke Juan. This was a big compliment coming from Eduardo. "Thanks."

Todd then spoke, getting out from behind the counter. "Alright you slackers. Let's bring Thomson the the base. You know what to do when you're done." He gave a shady look towards the bandits, picking up the one that had been accidentally chloroformed.

Eduardo and Juan picked up the sheriff, then took him to the horse that Todd owned, being very stealthy with their actions. But just in case anyone caught them, they had excuses.

Todd smirked as he rode off into the sunset with the three bandits and the sheriff.

Edward and Prince Matthew came out to get some air when they saw Todd and the bandits riding with the familiar figure. Edward squinted as to see what had happened. Thomson had appeared to be limp, and the bandits appeared to be whooping and cheering.

"We got 'im! We got 'im!!" They shouted loudly.

Edward and Matthew gasped. "Sheriff!!"

Edward almost ran for him, but Matthew stopped him. "Shhh." Began the prince. "Don't be so loud. We need to sneak over there."

"...right." Edward blushed with various embarrassments, smiling back at the prince.

Edward helped Matthew onto a brown and tan horse, climbing on right after helping. He pulled the reigns, then made sure it went as fast as it could, immediately taking a different route to follow the criminals.

"We're going to save you, sheriff. Don't you worry." Edward mumbled under his breath.

To be continued...

(This was just an idea in my head, I didn't know I'd be writing a fanfiction about it lol. So yeah, original story. Thanks for reading this far (:)