Being near her but not being able to touch her was more painful and agonizing than being far away from her. At least on the road, he didn’t have this awful feeling. It was always fluttery and anxoius to see her. But now, a disappointment and rage has built inside him. He didn’t want her to adore him, but at the same time he craved for her love. How messed up was that?
Brian closed his eyes, trying to sleep. Images of Michelle kept replaying in his mind. One by one, he pictured her smiling, laughing, fighting, giving him sceptical look, mocking with her tongue sticking out, her eyes rolling and a picture of them kissing. Slowly those images burned by the image of a ghost girlfriend. Someone Brian didn’t want to think of again.
Maya.
A girl so perfect in his past. She was everything, and he didn’t have that much experience with girls. He gave his whole heart out to her. She played with it, kept him on hook, until she broke it into pieces.
“Maya? Where have you been? I’ve been searching all over for you!”
Maya turned around. Her waist was circled by a pair of another tattoed hand, not Brian’s.
“Hey man! Great guitar solo up there last night!” Lars Ulrich, the legendary drummer from his favorite band Metallica greeted. He greeted him back out of respect but his eyes still searched for Maya’s, looking for answer.
“Lars, can you leave first? I need to settle something here.”
“Sure thing, baby.” Lars nodded, gave her a peck on her lips and walked away. Brian’s eyes widened, his eyebrows raised.
“What do you want, Syn?”
“You. You is what I want. Where were you? Come back please. We can start over.”
“No way. I don’t want to be with an addict.”
“I’m clean! I swear to you! It’s been a year!”
Maya chuckled. “Really? Do you think an addict like you can be ‘clean’ just like that? You will get back to it again, trust me.”
Brian didn’t know what to say. He wouldn’t promise to himself that he won’t use again, but he was trying hard not to.
“And for your info, Syn. I only want you then because you’re so damn popular. But right now, you are nothing. Just a junk I used to have.”
Just a junk I used to have.
Just a junk I used to have.
Brian opened his eyes abruptly. That last sentence kept replaying in his mind like a broken record. He needed something to rage his heart out to. He stood up suddenly, grabbed for his carkeys and left home.
******************************************************************************************************
He looked up to the blond girl. She had a huge pair of tits, and a full red lips that would definitely make any man want to grab her and sex her right there. She was the best girl this strip club has. Brian was an exclusive customer, a celebrity, so he got to enjoy this kind of treatment.
But Brian’s eyes were dead. There was no lust in it. He looked at the girl only for the sake of looking. He was bored. He didn’t get his boner, and his heart wasn’t pumping fast like it always did when he saw Michelle. Only by seeing her face, her smile, and her lip biting can make him turn on as hell.
This girl was trying her best to give Brian a perfect lap dance. She was grinding her ass on his crotch but he only stared at her, like a dead man.
