You Know Nothing, Jon Snow

     He saw the blood frothing from her mouth. Replaying the moment.

He had watched her die. He had stood there and did nothing. The woman who had loved him, and taught him how to love. 

Her hair, kissed with fire, that he had carressed so fondly, splayed about her in the snow. Her eyes looked up him with a hurt and betrayal that broke his heart. Her lifes blood spilled onto the cold ground and a single tear rolled down her pale cheek. The arrow embeded in her stomach was not his, but in his dreams it always was. It was his command, his brother's shot that had killed her.

She didn't get a funeral, nobody had shed a tear when she died. She was burned with all the others. As if her life meant nothing and her existance was a nuisance. She was wiped from the earth with just an arrow, leaving no mark that she was ever alive. Nobody cared about her, all but Jon Snow. Eventually he would die too and  they would be together in death. And there would be nobody left to remember her and the lives she had attempted to save. 

The Nights Watch oath came floating into his mind, like a knife in his gut.

   "Night gathers, and now my watch begins. It shall not end until my death. I shall take no wife, hold no lands, father no children. I shall wear no crowns and win no glory. I shall live and die at my post. I am the sword in the darkness. I am the watcher on the walls. I am the fire that burns against the cold, the light that brings the dawn, the horn that wakes the sleepers, the shield that guards the realms of men. I pledge my life and honor to the Night's Watch, for this night and all nights to come."

He wanted to forget her, she was an outcast, she didn't belong with all the lords and ladies. She didn't belong with him. But everything had been okay when he was with her. She had made him feel safe, fixated on the idea, the fantasy that one day they could be together. As if he hadn't taken the vow, as if she was born on the other side of the wall, as if he was a Stark.

She was going to let all the other wildlings back through the wall. She would have wreaked havoc. This was the only way.

"You know nothing, Jon Snow" she had whispered with her last breath.