They will tell you that you can't do this, or you can't do that. They will tell you that you can't play rugby because it's too rough for girls to play. They will tell you that you have to do whatever your boyfriend says. They will tell you that you have to like makeup and you have to wear dresses and do your hair. They will tell you that you have to fall in love with a nice boy from a nice family and having nice little children. They will tell you that you must keep quiet and you must never speak out. They will tell you to make yourself small and insignificant, let the big boys talk. They will tell your only purpose in life is to spread your legs and look after the kids. They will to play an instrument and that beautiful girls like you can't play sports. They'll pay you less. They'll treat you with very little respect, with not even a fleeting thought for your feelings or opinions. You will follow all these rules and do whatever they tell you, you will think that it is normal and this is how you have to act and how you have to dress.
They will tell you that you can't do this and you have to do that. They will tell you that you have to play rugby, because you're a man and men are strong. They'll tell you that your girlfriend is only there to do housework and to pleasure you. They will tell you that makeup and dresses are for girls and no you can't have long hair and no, Fred, put down Emma's Barbies and come play outside. They will tell you to find a nice little girl to settle down with and to impregnate her as many times as you please. They will tell you that your opinion matters and that you must be loud and you must be the centre of attention and everyone loves a handsome boy like you. They will tell you to get a good job, work from 9-5 and be the breadwinner of your lovely suburban household. They will put an insane amount of pressure on you to be the best. You will follow these rules and do whatever they tell you, you'll play sports and you'll never touch a makeup brush. You will think that this is normal and it will be normal.
But maybe this feeling of doubt will creep into your mind, what if I did play sports? What if I wore trousers and didn't put on makeup in the morning? You'll try it, because you're curious. You'll break up with your classic teenage boyfriend, you try out for your local football team, your makeup brushes will stay locked away on the highest shelf and your dresses will go to charity. You'll ease into it, you'll speak up in class and you'll stop going to your piano lessons. You'll walk with a purpose and demand all the respect. You'll demand attention from the entire room when you speak. You'll get more confident, and then someone will yell at you, tell you that this is not how a lady should act, and that'll only boost your confidence. You'll go to the hair dressers the very next day and you'll have all your curls cut off, leaving you with only the hair on your scalp and it'll feel amazing. You'll branch out, you'll become friends with the quieter people, the weird ones, and you'll love every second of it. Then you'll get a job and demand to be payed as much as the men around you were. One day, an electric girl will walk into your life and you'll fall in love as soon as she walks in the door. You'll go out with this girl and it'll be exhilarating and fantastic. You'll get married and you'll settle down with this girl, you'll stare at her astounding beauty until your eyes pop. You'll eventually adopt kids and you'll drop out of work. You'll become an open feminist and you'll preach about it in the media and wow, women need this, they need people like you, people who will stand up to sexism.
The question of why will sneak into your mind when you're lying in bed beside your girlfriend. Why do I have to do this? Why do I play sports? What if you I picked up a makeup brush and donned a dress? And you think and you think deep. And you decide to give it a try. You'll quit you're football team and you'll break up with your girlfriend, but you'll do it nicely and explain the situation and then she'll forget you even exist. You'll get better grades and you'll stay quiet in class. Why should you do all the work, why should you lose your voice? Then, you'll pop into the small charity shop down the road and you'll buy a couple of pretty dresses and a bag of makeup, claiming they were for your girlfriend. You'll go home and you'll lock your room and you'll pull the dresses over your head and you'll use the mirror in your en suite to do your makeup. You'll look yourself up and down and damn this dress is comfortable and you'll feel pretty for the first time in your life. Then, someone will knock on your door and you'll scramble to tug the dress over your head and you'll not have time to wipe the makeup odd and you'll open the door to your mum and she'll mourn the loss of her son, her normal son, because this is not normal. And so you put away the dresses and the makeup. You'll refuse to get your hair cut until it's down to your shoulders and you'll be out at a pub and a handsome boy catches your eye and smiles at you and you smile back and then a hand is on your back and you're laughing and having the time of your life with this boy and when it gets late he'll give you his number and kiss you on the cheek and he'll go home. And you'll start dating this handsome boy from the pub. One day he'll be out and you'll put on one of the old dresses again and you'll do your makeup and he'll come home when you're still like this and he'll smile at you and he'll kiss you and you'll talk about it and he'll accept you. You'll wear whatever you like and act however you like and you'll change your name and you'll be happy.
Sexism and oppression are not natural things. We as a society need to work to get past these things, we need to understand that all people are equal and all people are different and if a boy wants to wear makeup and dresses and a girl wants to play sports, then so be it. We need to learn not to genderise things like clothes and hobbies. We need to learn to treat everyone with the same level of respect. We need to be equal, we need to be accepting, we need it.
