Cancer

Day 3

(this chapter is kind of a mess, sowy)

Levi

Day 3: should i tell her?

I wake up in my bed and think of the events that happened after I got home yesterday:

"we can hang out tomorrow and talk." Violet says.

"right, well I guess i'll see you later."

"see ya!"

I get out of the car, seeing that the sun has vanished from the sky. "drive safely." say then shut the car door and walk up the front door of my home.

I check my phone and see 27 missed calls from my mom. she is definitely gonna kill me.

I walk closer to the front door. I think this is it. goodbye world.

I open the door seeing my mom franticly pacing on the phone.

"Levi!!" she shouts, nearly destroying my ear drums. she runs towards me and I see her eyes tearing up.

but I stay silent.

she throws her arms around my neck, hugging me tightly. "where in Gods name have you been?!"

"out with a friend." I say. even though it was the truth, I began to panic on the inside.

"what friend? what his name?" she asks.

my heart beats faster. just breath. just breath.

"Violet."

"what kind of mother would name their son 'Violet'?"i hear her mumble under her breath. "where were you?"

I feel my palms getting sweaty. why me?

"I was over her house."

"her?"

"yes, Violet is a girl."

she just stares at me. I wonder what she's thinking about...

she continues staring. her stare quickly becomes to intense for me.

"would you quit staring at me?!" I move away from her and head towards the stairs. I start walking up, but my mothers words make me freeze. I turn back to look at her.

"what did you say?" I ask, not believing my ears.

"I said did you sleep with her? like did you have se-"

"I know what you mean! no! me and Violet did not--do it." I shout.

"I was just making sure." she pauses. "but does she know about your...condition?"

when she says this my heart skips a beat. does Violet know about my condition? does she really have to know? I don't want her to treat me differently.

"yeah, of course she knows." I lie straight to my mothers face, then quickly run up the stairs so I can forget everything's that's happened.

But I can't.

******

"okay, this is kind of a touchy subject for me. but I really do want to tell you. do you wanna go first?" Violet asks me.

I quickly think of something to tell her. "uh, I like dogs more than cats?"

nice.

she laughs softly. "thats not really what I was expecting, but doesn't everyone?"

"truse." I say looking at the ground, angry with my self for not telling the truth.

we both stay silent.

"anyways, forget about me. whats your story?" I say changing the subject.

"okay. Levi, I really trust you. we've only know each other for two days, and you've already been inside my house. you and Jesse are the only people who I really trust."

"speaking of Jesse...are you two-"

"NO! me and Jesse are not dating. literally everyone asks that. we're just really close friends. I think of Jesse as a brother. yeah, a very annoying brother. but don't tell him I said that." she giggles.

I smile because now I know that Jesse isn't dating her.

"good to know." I accidently said. Violet looks a me. smiling.

"I didn't mean it like that-" I quickly say trying to cover up.

"then what did you mean?" she says.

I stutter and fumble my words. what do I tell her? "I don't know."

she looks down, but keeps smiling. "okay."

"so whats your story?"

"are you sure there's nothing left of your story?"

I think she knows.

"nope."

she smiles "okay."

"why do you keep smiling like that?"

"because I laugh through my pain."

I don't reply. I sit silently waiting for her to begin.

"alright, so i'll start before my mom died." she stops to breath. "okay, so my parents would always argue and fight. I was much younger so I never knew what was going on. I remember watching tv and seeing how the parents on tv shows act, and I asked my mom how come her and my dad never acted like that. she told me that nothing you see on tv is real.

and I believed her.

so from that day on, I thought that the way my parents acted was how everyones parents were. I thought that the way they loved me was the way that everyones family loved their child.  later we moved to the house that I still live in now. I met Jesse. and every time my parents fought or argued, i'd sneak off to his house and he'd always try to make me smile just so I wouldn't think about my parents.

but it was this one summer Jesse had gone away. and of course my parents had a fight. my mom was talking about getting a divorce and taking custody of me. my dad didn't like that. I don't remember all of the argument but I remember him hitting my mom. the slap was so loud." tears start to fall from her eyes. she just chuckles and wipes them away.

"I ran out of my room to go help her, but he wouldn't let me. he grabbed me and took me out of the house. I heard my mom screaming my name. he put me in the car and drove off. I looked behind and saw my mom running after the car. I could never forget the look on her face." she wipes away more tears that dared to fall.

"he took me to my aunts house and he left me there for a whole month. when he came back he told me that my mom died. I was so confused because it didn't make any sense."

"do you think that your dad killed her?" I whisper.

"I thought that he did for a long time, but its impossible."

I decided not to ask how it was impossible for her father to kill her mom. there's obviously more to the story that's she's not telling me.

she wipes her tears. "so are you sure you have nothing to share."

"i swear, I have no secrets." why did I say that? I feel so bad, lying to her like this. especially when she just told me about her past. and her father. my dream! in my dream her dad hit her. how did I know that would happen?

"did your dad ever...hurt you?" I ask, wanting to know more.

"no. never. he yells at me a lot, but he's never hit me."

I let that sink in, letting out a breath of relief. I want to hug her but stupidly I say, "okay."

******

"wow." Violet says after listening to twenty one pilots second album, Vessel. she wipes the tears that fell from her eyes.

"yeah. I know."

"it'd be pretty awesome to see them live."

"awesome is an under statement. it is literally my dream to see them live."

she just smiles at me. "I'll keep that in mind."