One Summer's Day

Spirited Away

No dreams last night. I slept even better than a baby. I woke up refreshed and with no pencils in my back. I trudged through the morning, still not able to remember. I ponder and ponder and ponder.

I sit in my advanced physics class which is usually my favorite class. But today I can't focus. I'm trying to dig as far as I can into my brain. Trying and trying to remember what I forgot. I rub the dragon scale between my fingers, thinking it might help.
I close my eyes. Drown out all sound. Focus Chihiro. Just focus.

I hear a name. Not Cen, but. But my own. It starts quiet and gets louder and louder.
"Chihiro, Chihiro, Chihiro, CHIHIRO!", Mr Cho is finally yelling.

I jolt my eyes open to see everyone looking at me and Mr. Cho standing at my desk.
"If you feel like you can sleep in this class would you like to teach it?", he says. Everyone laughs.
I shake my head embarrassed.
"Good. I'd like you to participate in my class. Understood?"
"Yes sir", I say quietly. Everyone laughs again. I look to my right and see Stematu laughing too.

Class is finally over and I rush to get my books together.
"Chihiro", Mr. Cho says. "A word please."
Great. I walk over to his desk timidly, awaiting the harsh warning.
"I'd like to think you and I have a good relationship in this class. You're a very bright student whom I've only seen succeed in her studies. If something is bothering you, just know I'm here to talk to if you ever need me."
He's right. I love Mr. Cho. He's my absolute favourite teacher. And oddly I think I can tell him. I think he'll understand.

"I don't know. I just keep seeing things that trigger a memory. A memory of something. But I don't know what it is. I can't figure it out but I can't get it out of my head, and it's almost driving me crazy."
He looks at me for a second. Taking in and thinking about what I said.
"Well", he starts. "I'm sure it will come. I've learned that once you do something, you never really forget. Even if you don't remember."

I gape at his words. It triggers something else. I remember someone telling me that. Someone very important. I remember learning that for myself, and cherishing what it meant.

"Are you okay."
I nod my head and walk out the door into the hall. As I walk I think of what he told me.
'Once you do something, you never really forget. Even if you don't remember. Once you meet someone, you never really forget them. Even if you don't remember.' Wait. Did I just think of that?
"Ow!", I say as someone pushes me in the hall.
"Oh gosh I'm so sorry." It's Stematu. Here we go.
"It's, it's ok", I say timidly.
"Are you alright?", he asks.
"Mmhmm."
"Well I mean like in class. You seemed a little out of it."
"Oh", I say, but not really meaning to.
"Uh yeah I uhh, I'm just uhh, tired I guess."
He smiles. "Well I hope you feel better soon."
Before I can say thank you his friends have called him and he walks in the other direction. I finally breathe when I didn't know I was holding my breath.
Why must I always be so awkward?

***

I'm at the beach with me and Kira's family. We go every Tuesday after school as like a little tradition. Me and Kira sit on towels together eating homemade sushi. When I tell her about the whole Stematu incident she completely flips out telling me that he loves me and that we are quote on quote "made for each other." Complete nonsense. But eventually she gets tired of ranting to me about my love life and we both fall asleep.

The clouds and thunder seem to come out of nowhere, but it seems to wake everyone up.
"Get your towels girls we're going", my mom yells to us. I roll up my towel and follow Kira towards our parents, until I feel the wind pushing against me.

Small green leaves fly past my ankles. But there's no trees here. The wind pushes me in the opposite direction, and I turn to face the ocean.

I can hear it. I can feel it calling me. So I let the wind push me, and I walk towards the water. I hear Kira calling me to come back but I keep going. I keep walking with my wind until I reach the end.
I can feel everyone looking back at me. Wondering what I'm doing. The thunder gets louder. The wind blows stronger. So strong it blows the sand and hits my skin.

And in that moment, I see it in the water. I see tracks. Train tracks starting at the shore. And leading out deeper into the ocean. What are they doing? Where did they come from? What are they and why are they just as familiar as everything else?

I hear the ocean now. I look up to see a monstrous wave, coming straight in my direction. Everyone screams for me. My eyes fill with fear. My stomach flies up. But I can't move. I can't move a muscle. I don't even blink.

I hear my mother scream so loud, but then it's too late. The water has surrounded me, and it pushes me farther and farther from the shore. I fight it. I swim as hard as I can. But it's no use at all. The waves are like giant hands. They just keep pushing and pushing.

Eventually I give up. I must. I just let the spirit of the ocean take me farther
And father
Away