Dispair

Chapter Six: New Friend?

Chapter Six. New Friend?

"This is New Years Day- so rise from the ashes Faith will find a way- like lightning crashes We'll keep marching on and on and on..."

-Black Veil Brides

Jennifer's P.O.V---------------------

After Brad leaves I grab my phone and try to call Amber.

Ring.....ring.....ring.....ring....ring..... you have reached the voicemail of Amber, leave your message after the beep.

I hang up before the beep comes. I slam my head onto the pillow. Why in the hell did I do this? What's wrong with me? I plug my headphones back into my phone and look through my playlists. Sleeping with sirens? Nah maybe another time. Fall out boy? No maybe later. Panic at the disco? Uhmm no. Black veil brides? Hell to the yes. I turn on my Black Veil Brides playlist. The song New Years Day starts to play.

"All the graves of the ones remembered in a desert we call home All the slaves of the cold December find a voice to call their own Stand up we are united in the eyes of the greatest storm Line up we are ignited, this world will be reborn in...

Five, Four, Three, Two, One This is New Years Day- so rise from the ashes-." I mumble along quietly, until a lady comes in. I take my headphones off and turn my phone to vibrate. The woman has blonde hair, its teased and has a little pink bow on the side. She's not wearing a doctor coat thingy but has a half white jacket that says Dr. Something. I can't read it.

"Hello, Ms. Scott? Jennifer right?" I nod my head and she smiles. "Well Jennifer. I am and will be your therapist. My name is Julie. You can call me Mrs. Julie or Julie. Whatever makes you feel more comfortable." She looks at her clipboard and writes things down.

"Okay. Julie, I really don't need a shrink or anything. I handle my problems just fine." I look at her in the eyes and her eyes burn with sincere. I guess she saw my arms.

"Well. Jennifer, I think that this is not a good way of handling your problems." She pulls out my arm and points with her finger. "Cutting is not healthy. It is a terrible way to handle your problems. I have been a therapist for two years now and have learned alot about juveniles and cutting." She puts down her clipboard and looks at me. "Most teenage girls think of it as a game." She says, putting air quotations around the word game. "Many, just do it for attention while others really have problems and do not know how to handle their problems. You Jennifer, have problems that are unsettled, I can see it on your face." I look at her, going to say something but nothing comes out. "I heard you singing or whispering that song. Isn't that music depressing? Many of my clients listen to that music. Black Veil Brides huh?" She look at me and smiles. I smirk and nod.

"It isn't depressing music. It is simply rock." I say and she just nods. After a while of talking she leaves. After a week or two of being all happy go lucky they let me go home. I have to see Julie twice a week, so about 10 times a month. Brad texts me non stop, we talk on the phone for hours. I think I might love him. I finally went back to school after two and a half weeks of not going.

My alarm clock rings and I throw it on the floor. I look at my arms and see the left over scars. I get dressed in a Black Veil Brides tee shirt and black skinny jeans. I apply my makeup and grab my shoes, black Vans. I find my backpack and my phone, grabbing my headphones I plug them into my phone and walk to school. The song Saviour is playing.

" I never meant to be the one Who kept you from the dark But now I know my wounds are sewn Because of who you are I will take this burden on And become the holy one But remember I am human And I'm bound to sing this song

So hear my voice remind you not to bleed I am here, Saviour will be there When you are feeling alone, oh A saviour for all that you do So you live freely without their harm

So here I write my lullaby To all the lonely ones Remember as you learn to try To be the one you love So I can take this pen And teach you how to live What is left unsaid The greatest gift I give

So hear my voice remind you not to bleed I am here, Saviour will be there When you are feeling alone, oh A saviour for all that you do So you live freely without their harm-" I sing along until I see Tara and her mates. I run into the school and try to find Amber or someone.

"Woah. Little miss Jennifer try to slit her wrists huh?" I turn around and hear Tara talking in a baby voice and staring at me.

"Its none of your buisness. So fuck off." I say and keep walking until the heel clicks get closer. Someone pulls my hair and drags me into the corner. I open my eyes and it's Jackie.

"Oh Jennifer, Jennifer, Jennifer. You really shouldn't do that. Cussing is not allowed." I gasped and looked at Jackie, with her pink binder in her arm.

"What do you want?" I say loosing her grip on my arm.

"I want to know what's up with you. What did I do to you to make you hate me? I never did anything to you but be there for you so what could I possibly have done?" She says and tears start to bulid up in her eyes.

"WHAT YOU DID? YOU KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU DID. DOES THIS JOG YOUR FUCKING MEMORY?" I pull up my sleeve exposing the scars. She gasped and starts to cry.

"I'm- I - a-a-am s-s-so sorr-y-y." She says and looks me in the eyes.

"It's too late for that." I say and walk away. I leave her in the corner crying. I didn't need her sympathy, her crying didn't mean shit to me. I run to the bathroom and cry. Just cried. I hear the bell ring and I see Brad.

"Hey babe." He says kissing my cheeck.

"Hey." I smiled knowing not to break personality. Happy.

"You okay?" He says wiping my eye. "Have you been crying?" I shake my head and we walk to class.

First, second, third and fourth period went by fast. I didn't eat lunch, just listened to music in the bathroom. I can't wait for fifth period. Music. I run into the room and tell Ms. Lillian that I need to be alone, she says okay, I go into her office and grab my phone. I turn on some music. Hmmm.... Fall out boy, What a catch,Donnie starts to play and I hum the words and fade away with the lyrics.

" They say the captain Goes down with the ship So, when the world ends Will God go down with it? Miss Flack said I still want you back Yeah, Miss Flack said I still want you back

I got troubled thoughts And the self-esteem to match What a catch, what a catch And all I can think of." I feel someone shaking me and calling my name. I open my eyes and see a girl with black hair, teased with blonde highlights.

"Hey. Jennifer!" She yell and I take my headphones out.

"Who are you?" I yell and get into a position that I am practically sit-standing on the chair grasping my phone.

"Oh yeah. I forgot to do that. Sorry. Uhhhh, I'm Sandra." She puts her hand out and I shake my head. "Well nice to meet you. I-Uh-We have to do a project together. Choir, singing. Uhhh..." she pauses and takes a breath. "You like Fall Out Boy?" She asks.

"Yeah. Their music is pretty good." I smile at her and look at her shoes. They have Black and Blue paint splatters on them with the saying 'BVB ARMY RULES.'

"Iloveyourshoes!!" I yell out and she starts to smile.

"Huh? Oh thanks." She says tapping her shoes together. We talked alot through out the period and decided the song we were going to sing was Saviour by Black veil Brides.

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Author's Note.

HiHi :) sorry for crappy chapter but yeah!!

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