When I was 14
A boy called me beautiful
Behind the cover of a cell phone
But rejected my company
When I met him face-to-face
In any hallway
Where eyes could see
The girl I was..
And made me insecure
Of my entire being.
When I was 14
I judged my self-worth
Based on whether or not
My face could keep a boy interested
Rather than hoping my
Personality and wit could
Entertain him
Even though he never took the time
To learn my last name,
Let alone the beauty of my soul.
When i was 15
A boy asked to see me
In public
Late at night,
And my little heart soared
When he argued for me to come
Because he loved me
And he needed to see me.
Wait... no.
I was 15 years old
When a boy claimed to love me
When in reality he loved
The way my boobs and ass
Felt in his hands
When he took advantage of me.
He didn't need to see me,
He needed to see my body.
He didn't love me,
He loved my body.
I was 15 years old,
And I gave myself completely
To the boy who claimed to love me
And then ignored me
For months on end.
And still I blamed myself.
Because he was a god
Sent from heaven
And I was a peasant,
Meant to worship at his feet
And kiss the ground he walked on
Because I was beneath him
And thank god he loves me.
I was 15 years old
When I learned the hard way
That boys will say whatever they need
To trick you to give them
Whatever they want.
Because their wants
