Beyoncé, 12:18am.
"You really hurt me, Shawn."
"All I need is one more chance, let me prove it to you." He said as his fingers went up and down my spine.
We've been laying down in my bed talking for hours, as if I don't have to work in a few hours.
"You always say that."
"The thing is... I'm really serious this time." He said looking down into my eyes. "I love you."
"I'm not going to just jump back into this with you, Shawn."
"You don't have to. I'm going to show you I've changed."
"You changed so much in one day?"
"Yes all it took was Ty telling me straight up, looking into P's eyes, and tasting that sweet- OW!" He yelled because I elbowed him.
I chuckled. "So stupid."
"But you love me, right?" He said squeezing me tighter.
"I do love you. But, that's not enough."
"All you gotta do is say the word."
"What are you asking me?"
"To be my girlfriend?" He said and I looked up at him. "Not right now, I will work toward that goal."
"You're going to ask me for the 3rd time?"
"That's the charm, right?"
"I don't know, Shawn."
"Don't even think about it right now. I can't wait to be everything you want me to be."
*
7:39am.
"Ughhh! How are you supposed to put her shoes on? They don't fit!"
"Finesse, Shawn, finesse." I said rolling my eyes. It's cute that he's trying but it's frustrating at the same time.
He should've been here learning while I was. We could've been through this together.
I still hate leaving my child alone with him. For the simple fact that he has no clue what he's doing.
"Cut me some slack."
"No, you should have had this down already."
"I can't change the past, Bey. We gotta live for now. And now I'm trying."
"Hold her ankle and wiggle the shoe on her foot. Sometimes you might have to use your finger to unfold the back." I demonstrated. "It's not rocket science."
He did what I did and got her shoe all the way on. "Aye!" He picked her up and spun around. "Daddy did that!"
"She doesn't like to play when she first wakes up. That will only make her cranky for the rest of the day."
He nodded and put her down. She immediately started whining and reached for me.
I picked her back up and she laid her head on my shoulder. "Such a mama's girl." Jay said looking at her.
