Why Me?

Why Can't I Smile

Chapter 1

When I awoke it was pitch black, I couldn't see anything, nothing but darkness. I remembered that Ms. Hunt had dragged me down into the basement and gave me a beating again, she didn't like how I was talking back to her. I looked at my slashes all along my back, arms, and legs. My wounds were dirty but I paid no attention, it's not like it mattered. I just closed my eyes and let my thoughts drift away. Not concerning myself over house hold jobs, bills, nothing. By the way, my name is Amber; I'm 16 years old. As you can see I am not much, just an average girl that grew up in the wrong "family." But I am glad my name is Amber, the amber that hardens, counseling everything with transparent yellowy shield, harden as solid as a rock, not letting anyone in or out. But the only reason why I like my name is that I sound as if I am strong, I need to be strong, or I will not be able to fight for myself. Even though I want to be sweet and happy, it seems so far away. Whenever I try to smile, I remember the past, and all I can do is force a fake smile. No one notices because I was never truly happy with them once. Every night I wish I said something different or did something different. I do not know anymore. But I remember when my happiness was floating away from me. A long time ago I pushed aside my feelings; it was too painful. I remember staring out the window every night wondering how this happened, why my new "family" despised me, getting beat for no reason, everyone turning their back on me, not being allowed to befriend anyone, and how she never brings up my past, nor tells me when I ask. I guess I am just that maid girl that Ms. Hunt pick up because she was bored.

I heard a shout from outside the door of the basement; I gradually opened my eyes to see a short lady with green eyes and short curly black hair, Ms. Hunt, the last person I would want to see while I am in this state. I stood up even though I felt a stabbing pain all over. I looked to the pavement floor like I usually did.

"Now have you learned anything from this? Or would you like me to keep you down here for a little longer" Ms. Hunt said while smiling with amusement.

"I know my place, milady" my face had no expression; it was blank as white paper. But white paper yearns to be colored with beautiful colors, which I don't want to thing such as that, well I think so at least. Well, I used to anyway, but it's not like it matters.

Ms. Hunt turned around and was about to walk out the door when she spoke: "I can see you are behaving, and there is much work for you, so I permit you to leave here, but if you upset me again, you will come back."

"Yes, my lady" I replied

Ms. Hunt turned, walked up the concrete steps and soon disappeared. The head maid that was standing right behind Ms. Hunt before she left, I didn't even notice her because it was so dark. With her blond hair tied in a bun, and her brown eyes on me. She tosses the key to me to unlock the chains around my ankles and wrists. Then she turned around and mumbled something I fairly heard. It went something like this "what I nuisance, she should be kicked out; I hate this trash, why do I have to take care of her, she should be thrown away with the trash..." I didn't hear the rest because right after she thrown the key, she turned around and walked up stairs and soon vanished. I didn't care what she thinks of me; well I don't care for much for things at this point.

I reached for the key, it took me a while till I could reach it, but I got it. I think the head maid was always out to get me because she always has thrown the key in the same spot or even further away from me so I couldn't reach it. Then I have to struggle to reach for the key. I unlocked myself, stood up then walked up the steps into the bright light.