I walked home from another stupid day at school, carrying my bag.
"Nicole, walk into the street!" I heard my head scream at me. I ignored it like always. I was extremely paranoid and introverted, I also have insomnia and schizophrenia, my life is great...
"Nicole!" I heard someone shout from behind me, I turned and the girl grabbed my wrists tightly, I had seen this girl around school before, "Ander likes you!"
"Just go die" my head spun into its spiral again.
"O...kay..." I said unsure, "please let me go now,"
"S-Sure," she said dropping my hands, "Well are you gonna say yes??"
"...?"
"If he asks you out duh...?"
"I don't know and really don't care," I turned and continued to my house. I arrived at the apartment building, opening the glass door and hopping on the elevator, I walked down the plain boring hallways coated with tacky wallpaper, the floor creaking with each step. I got my key and opened the door, swiftly stepping in and closing the door behind me. I slipped my shoes of and plopped down in a kitchen chair.
"How about you don't eat and starve yourself"
"Food sounds great right now, actually" I said quietly. I walked into the kitchen and opened the fridge, it casts a light down onto the cheap tile. I saw some bread so I made toast and cheese for the top of it, so I made cheese toast. I sat on my dresser facing the window, there was no point in the world anymore.
"Nicole," I looked down at the pocket knife sitting next to some candles. I began to cry.
"Nicole!"
"NICOLE!!" I looked up to see my 'friend' Alan.
I sniffed and wiped my tears with my uniform's sleeve. Alan ran over and comforted me. 'Go die' my head spoke and I sobbed louder tightly grabbing the back of Alan's shirt as I cried into his shoulder, his blonde hair fusing with my dark-blonde hair,
"I'll keep you safe," he hugged me tighter, " I promise,"
We split from the hug and he carried my to the bathroom and sat me on the stool.
"Now, tell me what happened, please," Alan spoke gingerly.
"A-Alright," I sniffed, and decided to tell him, "M-My friend, he, he,"
Alan patted my back making small circles with his hand, I won't lie, I loved Alan, he was like the one of those friends that I always wanted but never had. He isn't my boyfriend or anything, but he does live with me. He has known me for a long time, but we just connected about a year ago, he looks a lot older than me, yet he is the same age as me. I wouldn't want anything to change to be a hundred percent honest, I love things the way they are, except one thing, and that's Scott. Scott just left, one of my best friends just left. One day he just left the school. I was heartbroken. I had known him for 3 years, and in these 3 years, we had fallen in and out of love, and I was missing him. We hadn't talked in person, but we saw each other all the time, Scott had gingery orange hair that formed a quiff on his forehead with a single streak of white. He had the most beautiful eyes, a mixture of blue, green, and yellow, all fusing around his pupils. His stature was nothing short of adorable, he was a tiny bit taller than me, but I still picked on him and convinced him we were the same height. Scott would always scruff my hair, kiss me on the cheek, and tell me goodnight right before we parted each day, that is the most we've ever talked in real life. We always skype, sometimes the occasional text while he's off in a different place on a trip or something.
"Alan, stop it!" My head yelled, and out of reflex, I yelled at Alan.
"Alan! I hate this! Stop! This is torture, save me!" I screamed breaking down once again, "This is all a lie, isn't it!?"
"Nicole, stop!" Alan shouted. "Nicole, I just want you to grab that knife..."
"What!?" I said back, my eyes ready to kill anything in my path.
"Nicole, what's wrong!?" He panicked, I backed him to the wall, I grabbed a pair of scissors from the counter and held them to Alan's neck. Then I realized it was my head telling me to grab the knife... I got shivers and the scissors fell from my hands, scraping my leg on the way down. I fell asleep on the cheap, cold bathroom tile, waiting for the next day.
