09 | I need compensation

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09 | I need compensation

Kim | Trev

❝This is IKEA's help center speaking

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❝This is IKEA's help center speaking. How may I help you?❞



It's me.



❝Mr Arden?❞



How'd you know?



❝Your voice. How may I help you?❞



Well, I wasn't going to call, but one of my friends happened to send me a screenshot of a particular tweet.



❝And?❞



Guess which tweet that was.



❝Oh. I'm sorry, Mr Arden. There's nothing we can do about the screenshots.❞



And is that my fault?



❝No! Of course not.❞



I really don't want to be that type of customer, but this is important to me. Did you read the comments in those screenshots? They were vicious.



❝The comments?❞



Yes.



❝Could you send those screenshots to me?❞



For?



❝I'm just curious, sorry.❞



Fine.



❝Let me just take a look. Oh my god, I'm so sorry.❞



...



❝Is what they're saying true?❞



No, okay? They shrunk because I was cold. I'm not small.



❝Oh...❞



The point is, this entire situation has completely ruined my life.



❝I'm so sorry, this must be tough for you.❞



...



❝How would you like me to help you? I can't hack into their phones and delete the screenshots, though. Excel sheets are confusing enough for me.❞



You mentioned compensation?



❝Yes! Didn't you say that you didn't need one?❞



I take that back. I need compensation.



❝What would that be?❞



Go on a date with me.

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